I need help with a response to this email

[NOW tense]

NEW CHEMICAL ELEMENT

Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has
discovered the heaviest element
yet known to science. The new element,
Governmentium (symbol=Gv),
has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88
deputy neutrons, and 198
assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an
atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by
forces called morons,
which are surrounded by vast quantities of
lepton-like particles called
peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons,
it is inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every
reaction with which it comes
into contact.

A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a
reaction that would
normally take less than a second, to take
from 4 days to 4 years to complete.
Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 to 6 years.
It does not decay, but instead undergoes a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.
In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to
become neutrons, forming
isodopes. This characteristic of moron
promotion leads some scientists
to believe that Governmentium is formed
whenever morons reach a
critical concentration.

This hypothetical quantity is referred to as
critical morass. When
catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes
Administratium
(symbol=Ad), an element that radiates just as
much energy as
Governmentium, since it has half as many
peons but twice as many morons.

[louis-t]

1. I couldn't even help you with READING the damn thing.

I think the last paragraph is wrong. It should say "critical moran."

[nini]

2. why?

it's just a stupid 'joke' not worthy of a battle IMHO.

[NOW tense]

5. I am not looking for a mean response.

more of a smart ass response, and since I am only one part of smart ass. I would like some help.

[nini]

8. well...

when Governmentium is mixed with GOP it causes stagnation a of INT more commonly known as intelligence.

Fueled by the element BS - the mix of Governmentium and GOP brings an implosion of progress and effectiveness.

?

[OKNancy]

3. "that's stupid"

[Mist]

4. Response: "Gibberish." nt

[havocmom]

6. always curious why people post silly emails without any personal comments

Like, does posting to DU get the silly email further or what?

Sure, sure, want help with response, that is also common when such tripe is posted; yet no bones of what your reply would even start with.

Just always seems odd.

[NOW tense]

7. I like your sig line

Follow it.

[havocmom]

12. I do

LOL

[Cerridwen]

9. WARNING: should be handled with extreme care due to

WARNING: Governmentium should be handled with extreme care due to
its power to enhance the common good. Should not be handled by repubs, lobbyists, corporate CEOs, hedge fund directors, or those who are not fully conversant in the "prudent practices for handling powerful chemicals," hereafter referred to as the US Constitution. Due to its volatile nature, those who are susceptible to greed, avarice, and/or power mongering are strictly prohibited its use.

edit for some formatting

[NOW tense]

10. Thank you. n/t

[Cerridwen]

11. You're welcome. n/t

[NOW tense]

14. That was the kind of response that I knew

I could not produce. Thanks again.

[Cerridwen]

15. Some days I got snark; some days not.

Today was - eh.

Let me know the response - if you're so inclined.

I hope it helps or gives you ideas for your own snark.

:D

[NOW tense]

16. Update

Word.


Oh, that was good! That was really, really good!!!

[Cerridwen]

17. Nice.

Glad to hear it.

I'll have to remember to keep my snark on. LOL

[Mz Pip]

18. Good snark

Bookmarked.

I used to get lots of this crap from my RW relatives. They've been remarkably silent since the election. Though I did get a couple of bad anti-stimulus cartoons to which I replied: "Where was all this outrage when Bush was spending 800 billion in Iraq or when he didn't veto a single Republican spending bill that landed on his desk?"

I haven't heard back.

Go figure. :eyes:

[Cerridwen]

19. Thank you.

I've noticed some when confronted with their hypocrasy will grow quiet. Others scream at the top of their lungs that "this is different!" or "I didn't say that!"

Glad you got the quiet ones. The other ones are too weird for words. And they hurt my ears.

[lsewpershad]

13. Best answer IGNORE

[Mz Pip]

20. Naw

At least with the crew I have to deal with IGNORE is exactly what they want if you don't agree. There seems to be the attitude that if you do not respond, in their minds you agree. I never, ever ignore bullshit. I know it is easier to do so and I know I won't change any minds with my response but I refuse to be passive. And they know that there is an opposing point of view, that not everyone in their address book is a dittohead.