Hero Cops Taser, Arrest Dick Cheney

[NYCGirl]

Unfortunately, it was just someone who thought he was Dick Cheney...

http://wonkette.com/politics/dick-cheney/hero-cops-taser-arrest-dick-cheney-247787.php

Quick-witted police officers in Connecticut finally took down the lawless fugitive who’s been operating terrorizing America for the last 6 years. Dick Cheney was spotted driving recklessly through Long Beach Monday night, and once police finally got him to pull over, they were forced to stun him before they could get him into custody. Not even a stun gun can stop Cheney’s pathological lying, though, so the veep continued leading police on even while in their custody.

John Spernak, 42, of Meadow Street, claimed during his arrest to be the vice president as well as the husband of Nicky Hilton, sister of pop celebrity Paris Hilton, police said. He was charged with attempted first-degree assault, engaging police in a pursuit, reckless driving, criminal mischief, interfering with police and being in a town park after dark.

While in custody, police said, Spernak admitted he wasn’t Cheney, but rather Jaclyn Smith, former star of the television show “Charlie’s Angels.” He was taken to Bridgeport Hospital for a psychiatric evaluation.

We hope the Vice President gets the help he so desperately needs. Though we’re sure he’ll simply break out of the asylum to kill again, like a Batman villain.

[CrazyOrangeCat]

1. Wonder if they water-boarded him . . .

. . . to get him to admit to being Jaclyn Smith??

[NYCGirl]

We can only hope.

:rofl:

[TahitiNut]

2. Questionable taste. I'd rather be Kate Jackson than Jaclyn Smith.

But that's just me, I guess. :shrug:

[NYCGirl]

4. Sure he had bad taste — he said he was Dick Cheney! NT

[Autonomy]

3. He should have shot someone in the face

then they would have believed him.