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I live in Connecticut. Meetings for Connecticut's Democratic Town Committee (DTC) meetings have to be published publicly. My town's web site publishes the Democratic and Republican Committee meetings on their event calendar. I suppose they would also do other legit parties as well but for now the Democratic and Republican Parties are the only 2 active parties in my town.
Your state's Secretary of State's office should have some information on the political parties including the bylaws, which should tell you that the meetings are open to the public and any Democrat in that local area can attend. Town clerks may also have a copy of the party's bylaws. In Connecticut, the DTC's file their bylaws with the Town Clerk, who sends a copy to the Secretary of State. If you can find your state Democratic Parties web site, they may have information on meeting dates, etc, but I would trust your town or the Secretary of State's office first. The State party's web site could be out of date.
Once you find out when the meetings are you can attend. The bylaws should also tell you when the Caucus to elect new members should happen. Ours happens every 2 years and is held sometime around mid-January. The Caucus meeting has to be published publicly because any registered Democrat in town can vote in it. The Caucus is when you can either add your name to an existing slate of committee members or you can find friends who will make a slate to challenge the incumbents. Connecticut's DTC elections are in March if there are competing slates of committee members.
Outside of the Caucus, if there are spots open, you would need to be voted in my the incumbent members with a simple majority.
Unless you take over your local Dem Committee with a lot of new blood, you will have to be patient about fitting in and changing your local party from within. I joined mine in 2003. Currently, I'm serving as secretary of my DTC. In 2005 I was voted secretary after the incumbent had to move out of state to get a new job. Also, be willing to volunteer to help with party events, like fundraisers. It shows the other members, who don't know you, that you care about the local party. Quite often, local party committees are understaffed, so that may add to a feeling that it is run as a social club, but most of the time you will find that they are excited when new people are interested in joining.
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