Scientist: Angels can't fly

[The Straight Story]

Scientist: Angels can't fly


LONDON, Dec. 22 (UPI) -- A London scientist has authored a paper arguing angels as classically depicted, mostly-human forms with wings, would be unable to fly.

Professor Roger Wotton of University College London wrote in his paper, which was published by the school's Opticon magazine, that human-appearing angels with feathered bird-like wings would not be able to use the wings for flight, The Daily Telegraph reported Tuesday.

"Even a cursory examination of the evidence in representational arts shows that angels and cherubs cannot take off and cannot use powered flight," Wotton wrote. "And even if they used gliding flight, they would need to be exposed to very high wind velocities at take off -- such high winds that they would be blown away and have no need for wings."

Wotton's paper also took aim at fantasy depictions of fairies with the wings of butterflies.

http://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2009/12/22/Scientist-Angels-cant-fly/UPI-80971261512654/

[valerief]

1. Ridiculous! He should have been studying how many fit on the head of a pin! nt

[brooklynite]

26. No, that's being handled by the Math Department...

[provis99]

2. they do this stupid shit every year at this time.

[rd_kent]

32. Whats that? Claim that angels are real?

Or that jesus was born in december? Or that christmas came first, before all the other winter celbrations?


If thats what you are talking about, then yes, you are right. They do this stupid shit every year.

[WeDidIt]

3. Magical beings do not comply with the laws of physics

and thus, the scientist is demonstrated to have not fully thought out his hypothesis.

:evilgrin:

[Ozymanithrax]

4. Somebody had some time on his hands.

Perhaps we could get Harry Potter to debate him about that.

[MrCoffee]

5. What a tremendous waste of paper.

[rd_kent]

35. You're right, the printing stuff about angels and other make-believe things in a book IS a waste

of paper. Think how many trees we could save if bibles didn't get printed.....

[Winterblues]

6. Bumble bees and helicopters can't either.

Supposedly..:shrug:

[aquart]

7. Oh. And what about faith, then?

[immoderate]

8. I think he is overlooking the effects of pixie dust.

And uhm, happy thoughts. :)

--imm

[jgraz]

9. Somebody's bucking for an IgNobel.

[ElboRuum]

17. If so, he's got my vote.

Well played, Prof. Wotton, well played indeed.

[el_bryanto]

10. That's assuming Angels are made of the same kind of matter as mortals

But assuming you believe in Angels, presumably you are also capable of believing they are made of something else.

oh and Angel of the X-Man apparently has telekentic powers that let him fly.

Bryant

[BoneDaddy]

11. Correct

Although appearing as humans, angels could not fly based upon the laws of physics, but if they were made of a lighter substance, perhaps they could. :)

[Retrograde]

25. this is what the whole "head of a pin" debate was about

The "How many angels can dance on the head of a pin" was more about rather angels were corporeal (and therefore a limited number could) or incorporeal (and an infinite number could). At least according to my college thermodynamics text, which used this as some sort of analogy for quantum mechanics or something.

My preferred version: how many angels can swim in the head of a beer?

[Wapsie B]

12. Publish or perish

[madokie]

13. as soon as my ghost is released from my body I'm going to be flying around

might even come see you;-). I'll know it but you won't, now how is that for suspense?

[ElboRuum]

14. In other news...

University College London is currently investigating why Roger Wotton is wasting his time with this sort of nonsense. Professor Wotton, when asked about the necessity of such a bit of research, stated "This thing which probably doesn't exist couldn't possibly fly, I mean, if it did exist it would have trouble, only it doesn't and here's a paper which proves that this thing that doesn't exist couldn't possibly fly but if it did, yeah, so no it can't!"

Self-proclaimed Star Wars buff and student of Wotton's, Ansel Schmidt, Jr., incensed by the ludicrous assertions made by Wotton, countered with his own paper, consisting of a tattered bar napkin scrawled with the phrase, "Angels use repulsorlift technology, stupid!!" Additionally, Schmidt's treatment contains a personal commentary of Wotton's opinion in the form of a sketch of a stick figure with an upraised middle finger.

[Octafish]

15. Oh yeah? How's he explain Mercury getting around with wings on his hat and shoes?

Courtesy of the great M. K. Brown

[ElboRuum]

16. Mercury wore Nike Air Force Ones

'nuff said.

[Greyskye]

18. Of course not. They can in a microgravity environment, however.

Why do you think we never see angels on earth? Duh. :eyes:














:sarcasm:

[Are_grits_groceries]

19. GK Chesterton had it right:

"Angels can fly because they take themselves lightly."
-- GK Chesterton

[branders seine]

20. in a related story,

any random fifth grader could tell you that there is no way some bearded old dude on a cloud created everything.

[gratuitous]

21. Oh sure, next you'll be telling me

That the Millennium Falcon couldn't possibly have made the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs.

[Blue-Jay]

24. But....parsecs are a measure of distance, not time.

I think that was explained in one of the SW books, having to do with gravity wells and black holes and some shit like that, but I suspect that Lucas thought it "sounded cool" when he was writing the dialog.

What were we talking about again?.....

Oh! Angels! No such thing.

[gratuitous]

28. In YOUR universe, maybe

But long, long ago, in a galaxy far, far away, a parsec was something else entirely. Anyway, I don't have time for this foolishness; there's a talking whirlwind outside that's asking me a bunch of really nosy questions and calling me Job for some reason.

[ElboRuum]

31. No, but Han DID shoot first.

[Tierra_y_Libertad]

22. Especially now, with Homeland Security screens and profiling those halos look suspicious.

[KittyWampus]

23. Angel wings aren't feathered wings for bird-like flight. They're symbolic of magnetic fields

[ElboRuum]

29. No. Everyone knows they use jetpacks. n/t

[TexasObserver]

27. How many angels can take off or land on the head of a pin?

Apparently, none, if this jackass is right.

[snooper2]

30. well...

At least he didn't do the old "could the flood really have happened?"

Like the Discovery and History channel like to do

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[Iggo]

33. Dammit. I had "Because they are fictitious" in the pool. (n/t)

[UndertheOcean]

34. Obviously the guy has Tenure , he can publish whatever the heck he wants

and get it accepted too , up to a point.