Too Funny To Be True

[discocrisco01]

From the Northwest Florida News
"FORT WALTON BEACH - A 41-year-old Destin man was arrested after he put a pot roast down his pants, according to an Okaloosa County Sheriff's Office arrest report.

Edward Allen Collins entered the Winn-Dixie on Beal Parkway on Dec. 21 and picked out a pot roast worth $69.16, the report said. Collins then placed the pot roast inside his pants, attempted to conceal it, and exited the store without paying.

A store manager confonted Collins, who resisted, pulled away and tried to leave the property, the report said. But the manager was able to detain him after a brief struggle.

A background check showed that Collins had two prior larceny convictions.

Collins is charged with retail theft and resisting property recovery by a retail merchant. He is scheduled to appear in court Feb. 2"

This is just too funny to be true. I know this story would make the AP Oddball Wire tommorow.

Hmm. I might actually submit to the AP.

[havocmom]

1. Let me guess; you've never worked in retail?

I have heard of stranger things smuggled out of grocery stores in pants. You might be amazed.

[Common Sense Party]

2. A couple things: Do pot roasts really cost $70? That must be one big pot roast.

Also, he must have some big britches if he can fit a $70 pot roast down his pants.

[Z_I_Peevey]

13. I'm guessing it was a standing rib roast;

those could easily go for around $70.

[Common Sense Party]

14. Like for prime rib?

[givemebackmycountry]

3. I have at least $69.16 worth of meat in my pants -

And I wonder why my Mom's little dog and cats love it when I come to visit.
I don't need no steeken Winn-Dixie on Beal Parkway.


:sarcasm:
:hi:

[Digit]

4. I find it rather sad

Yes he was stealing, but he was stealing food and not something he could fence.
It just makes me wonder what his situation is and if perhaps his other thefts were for the necessities of life...like food.

I hope I never get that poor.

[snagglepuss]

5. My mom worked in a store in the 70s. A manager suspected a customer of

shoplifting and kept her talking till butter ran down her legs. She had stuffed butter down her pants.

[asdjrocky]

6. I never find people stealing food funny, I always find it sad.

And at 69 bucks for a pot roast, the store is doing the stealing here.

[StarfarerBill]

8. Ditto, +1

[blondeatlast]

9. Agreed. nt

[beyurslf]

7. A $70 pot roast would feed a block not just a household.

[fl_dem]

10. I live in Ft Walton, I shop at that Winn Dixie on a weekly basis

And I hear about this on DU... LOL

I don't know this man or his circumstances, but I do know if my kids were hungry and I've exhausted all other means, I would resort to steal to feed them. That being said....I cooked a pork roast for Christmas and it easily fed 12 people....I paid 24$ for it FROM the very same grocery store and it was huge, I can't imagine how big the 70$ was.

[AllentownJake]

11. People are stealing food and people find this funny

Maybe we should cut his hand off to make an example of him

:sarcasm:

[HopeHoops]

12. "Is that a pot roast in your pants or...

OMG!