10 words you need to stop misspelling - Funny!

[A HERETIC I AM]

From http://theoatmeal.com/comics/misspelling

Here's the rest; http://theoatmeal.com/comics/apostrophe

LOL..."Every time you spell it this way a Dolphin gets run over by a jet ski"

:rofl:

[greenbriar]

1. I would LOVE to have this as a poster

for my classroom

I am a horrible speller, but these words were drilled into us

[A HERETIC I AM]

4. Check the bottom of the page I linked at the top

It is available as a poster and you can purchase it from the website.

[woo me with science]

41. "Definately" incompletely drilled...

according to these months and months of posts:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=9047465&mesg_id=9048724

But I still believe you that it was just a long-term plot to bait Tangerine LaBamba! :yourock: :eyes:

[greenbriar]

48. wow, hum

leave it at that

[TicketyBoo]

162. Don't feel bad.

I've frequently seen it spelled "defiantly." Makes me cringe every time.

[JDPriestly]

88. I've never seen an "a" in definitely. How did I manage to miss that.

But I always do the 90's instead of the '90s bit. Stand corrected. And weird is a word I usually have to write and look at before I'm sure I'm right.

[DireStrike]

222. Usually, I before E. But "weird" is weird.

[JDPriestly]

242. I speak German. In German weise is pronounced "v (long i) za). The

ei is pronounced like the i in wise.

[PatrynXX]

226. get that right more than guarantee :P

that get closer?

course there's corporations messing us up too. Compact disc misspelled. Compact Disk!! oops. oh well

Now we have instead of sci-fi. SyFy seefee? wtf is that..

[katty]

97. me too! great road map

[Bonobo]

2. Please add "Lightning" to that!

Incredibly, I see "lightening" more and more as time passes. It really bugs me.

[caraher]

73. Amen

Once I was coaching rec league youth soccer and there was a team whose T-shirts read "Lightening." I felt bad for those kids...

[JDPriestly]

90. caraher, maybe it was a weight-loss soccer team.

[pink-o]

186. Maybe the team actually wanted to illuminate the sport...

but I somehow doubt it!

[rebel with a cause]

103. Okay, my spellchecker doesn't catch that one. lol

I have always been a terrible speller and even worse so after one of my illnesses. I have a spellchecker on my computer that usually catches the words I mess up on but quick typing often makes us, well me at least, use similar words by mistake and a spellchecker does not catch these because they are not misspelled. I could care less any more, there are so many worse things I could be doing. ;)

[tavalon]

182. But as any first time pregnant woman will tell you,

it does get much easier to breathe after lightening. That would be about 2-3 weeks before delivery. Women who have had more than one child often don't experience it until just before they go into labor.

[Bluebear]

3. Love, love, love it! To funny!

:)

>>>>Every time you spell it this way a dolphin gets run over by a jet ski<<<< :spray:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

8. My dear Bluebear...

Um, that would be "too funny!" Not "to funny"...

Sorry...to be the spelling Nazi...

[Bluebear]

12. Hence the smiley...an intended misspelling given the topic :)

[CaliforniaPeggy]

13. Aha! Gotcha!

I hadn't figured that out!

Thanks, sweetie...

:)

[bluesmail]

165. Me also. or is it too?

Spelling Nazi that is. :hide:

[PSzymeczek]

207. I'm with you!

I'm a language freak and the mistakes I see drive me batty.

[Hawkeye-X]

232. Just for you, my lovely Peggy

But I still love you, mwah!

Happy New Year, CP

[vixengrl]

5. This is the most brilliant thing ever.

I want to run off a billion copies and distribute it throughout the English-language-posting-on-the-internet world.

[A HERETIC I AM]

158. It is funny, isn't it?

I laugh every time I scroll down through it.

Lines like "There are many reasons to discipline a cow. For starters, a cow who eats rancid casserole will later become a host for alien parasites." just make me giggle!

I like things like this. Make education fun and funny and more people will learn.

I'm so glad you and the others who have commented liked it.

[leftstreet]

6. LOL these are great

:rofl:

[tabatha]

7. These are the most common on DU.

[mwb970]

203. More people get "it's" wrong than right now.

I constantly see "it's" as a possessive, On DU and everywhere else. I learned this rule in 5th grade and never get it wrong. Is it possible that there are no Americans left who can understand and follow a simple rule of grammar? How stupid are we, anyway?

BTW, I also hate it when people say "he gave a gift to my wife and I" or the like. Again, I learned that it is "to my wife and me" in elementary school. Now apparently nobody knows this any more. What is wrong with us? Pretty soon we will be back to communicating with grunts and hand gestures.

:eyes:

[tabatha]

229. yep and who and whom are also used incorrectly

[patrice]

237. Everyone is screwing up pronoun cases. I hear it on TV and radio constantly.

I refuse to give this one up to "usage"! It's not logical. It's confusing. Confusion in communication is expensive!

[femrap]

9. Affect/Effect always

gets to me. And losing and loosing screws with my head for some stupid reason.

Thx for posting.

[Iggo]

43. "...loosing screws..."

:crazy:

[Caliman73]

57. Just to be a little sadistic on New Year's Eve eve...

I will throw this one in.

Affect can also be a noun. Affect pronounced with an emphasis on the first syllable, is a term used to discuss the outward expression of a person's mood. A person describes their mood, but what you are seeing is their Affect.

For example, "Joe says he is sad, but he keeps laughing. His affect does not match his mood."

[caraher]

76. Quite true

but the rule-of-thumb that "affect" is usually a verb is very helpful to people who struggle with the difference.

And of course, "effect" can also be a verb!

[caraher]

77. Just for kicks, all the combinations in one sentence...

"The effect of noticing how my low mood affected my family was my decision to go into therapy to effect a change in my affect."

[PSzymeczek]

208. Bravo!

Excellent illustration of the usages.

[pink-o]

190. Here ya go,,,

You "effect" changes (bring about results). His behaviour was "affected" (actually an adjective, meaning pretentious. And the Brit spelling is deliberate, I lived in London for 5 years. Trying to break the bad habit though--it's somewhat "affected" like Madonna's accent)

[sabrina 1]

138. Just to be a pain in the neck

shouldn't you have have written your sentence this way:

And 'losing' and 'loosing' screws with my head for some stupid reason.

Sorry, blame the OP. Normally I am not a spelling or grammar nazi but I was influenced by the OP this time :-)

Mmm, now I'm wondering if it shouldn't be written this way:


And "losing" and "loosing" screws with my head for some stupid reason.

[femrap]

194. I will never

post in a Spelling/Grammar thread again!:dunce: :hide: :P

[sabrina 1]

204. Lol!

Happy New Year! :hi:

[femrap]

206. I've never had an instance

to use those particular 'smilies.' I should have added the 'hurts.'

Happy New Year to you, too!

I'm expecting a sucky economy, but then there is always the hope of winning the lottery.....right.

Maybe learning Portuguese and moving to Brazil is an idea???? What do I have to loose/lose??? :toast:

[struggle4progress]

10. Another word you need to stop misspelling is "vicious"

Check the Oscar Wilde quote in your sigline

[A HERETIC I AM]

15. Oh shit! Thanks. Fixed.

Damn...I did that months and months ago.

My apologies. Thanks for pointing it out.

All better now.

[struggle4progress]

36. Remember the spelling police motto!

;)

[A HERETIC I AM]

37. I've pretty much given up on correcting anyone, primarily cause I'm such a doofus.

I am a bit dyslexic and there are some things I can never get right, no matter how many times I see them spelled properly.
If it wasn't for the fact that I'm using Firefox and its automatic spell checkerizer, I would have a butt load more misspellings in every one of my posts!

[struggle4progress]

44. Now, see, you were supposed to ask me what the spelling police motto was, so I could say

I couldn't remember!

[A HERETIC I AM]

47. See? Told ya.

I'm a doofus.

[PatSeg]

79. It seems to me

that anything I didn't learn correctly as a child, gives me trouble as an adult. Thank god for spell check. I've been surprised to find that I had been misspelling certain words most of my life and my brain still wants to misspell them.

[gratefultobelib]

82. I was in my 30's before I realized "surprise" was not spelled "surprize!" College graduate I am!

[nolabear]

83. No Pullet Surprise for you! nt.

[gratefultobelib]

228. Omigosh. I was taking a shower a little earlier tonight, and all of a sudden I "got" your pun! Duh

[PatSeg]

201. That must have been quite a "surprize"!

I thought alot was a word.

[TicketyBoo]

111. I diligently avoid correcting people

because my son dubbed me the "Spelling Nazi" even before the Soup Nazi on Seinfeld existed. I was always correcting him, and I still do, because it's my duty to help my (now college-graduate) son put his best foot forward in the world.

But, the internet? I had to chill when I started communicating online, otherwise I would be deemed to be an insufferable know-it-all (which is easy enough to happen, anyway, when you're spouting your opinion right and left).

[zeemike]

176. I know what you mean.

And what a lot of people don't understand that this kind of learning by memorizations does not work for a lot of dyselixic...
I can remember having to chang words I am using because i just can't figure out how to spell the word I wanted to use....just a complete blank. And most of the time they are common words not the complex ones or hard to spell like scissors.or vacuum.

But I can see how some people would find it hard to understand that...I don't understand it myself.

[tavalon]

183. I'm a great speller despite my dyslexia

but I cannot keep a 4 number string in my head for anything. I switch numbers all the time!

[mascarax]

11. K&R - excellent poster!

Thanks for posting.

[jmowreader]

14. The eleventh word...

Pubic / public.

[spartan61]

16. And yet another mis-spelled word that really bugs me:

Correct spelling: SEPARATE

Incorrect spelling: SEPERATE

I see this so often and find it very annoying.

[A-Schwarzenegger]

19. There's a rat in separate.

[Fla Dem]

72. Well there is in both spellings, but there is a PAR in separate. n/t

:hi:

[A-Schwarzenegger]

105. There's "A RAT" only in the correct spelling.

:hi:

[Fla Dem]

161. You're absolutely correct!!! I overlooked the small "a" in you 1st note. LOL Happy New Year n/t

[johnaries]

21. And that's one that Spell-check actually catches.

I'll admit, I have found myself accidentally misspelling words and not noticing because I have come to depend too much on Spell-check. If the word is listed in the Spell-check library, then you don't get that alarming red squiggly line and so it goes unnoticed. But if it's not in the Spell-check list... that's just sad!

[wellstone dem]

33. That's it, seperate drives me out of my mind

I go storming into co-worker's office, "It's SEPARATE!!!"

[greenbriar]

52. I remember that as Se pa rate

don't know where or why , but that sticks out in my mind

[polmaven]

148. I am more than a little annoyed

every time I see someone who could of done something when that person really could've done it!

[johnaries]

17. Bookmarked! And I know the first person I'm sending the link to.

errr.. I mean, I know the first person to whom I'm sending the link.

"That is a criticism up with which I shall not put!"

:evilgrin:

Seriously, those are some of my pet peeves.... although my pet's name is actually Dodger and not "Peeve"....

Somebody, please stop me! Or else ask me about the prostitute and the Koala bear who eats bushes, and leaves......

[A HERETIC I AM]

18. Have you been drinking Malt Liquor with a Panda by any chance? n/t

[johnaries]

23. Worse. White Russians with a Pit Bull.

Although he's currently passed out on the bed.

[A HERETIC I AM]

30. My Old Boston Terrier couldn't hold his liquor either.

But he could hold the HELL out of a tree limb;


Not to mention suck his thumb;

That's him after one too many Whiskey Sours.

[GoCubsGo]

68. See the "How to Prepare Your Pet for War" link on that page

Your doggie looks like he'd be an instant war hero! :-)

[A HERETIC I AM]

166. SO, johnaries....now that it's New Years Eve...

Is your Bully looking at the Kahlua and Vodka with a wanton eye?

Happy New Year to you and your pup pup!

:fistbump: :toast:

[seabeyond]

28. my pet's name is actually Dodger ............... bah hahha. pushed your button

down below.........

and got another with the

............

lol

[TicketyBoo]

112. No, no.

It's eats, shoots, and leaves. But you knew that.

http://www.amazon.com/Eats-Shoots-Leaves-Tolerance-Punctuation/dp/1592400876

On second thought, it must be another joke I never heard about. (About which I never heard?) A dangling preposition sometimes makes for a less-awkward sentence.

[PSzymeczek]

209. That is

eats, shoots, and leaves.

[margotb822]

20. One more thing:

can we agree to limit our use of multiple periods to a proper ellipses?

No more of this:............................................

Please!

[seabeyond]

25. huh?????????? lol. nt

[bertman]

50. problem is, in the title bar the little dots have to be used because multiple spacer bar hits

do not register. So, you HAVE to use multiple ellipseseses to spread it out.

[annabanana]

75. . . . . . . . . phooey.

Won't do it. . . .

[TicketyBoo]

114. Not sure how to do it

on a Windows keyboard, but on a Mac, "Option" + ";" gets you an actual ellipse instead of three periods. (Just in case you may not have known and it comes in handy for you.)

[StarfarerBill]

22. Thank you for this! K&R

[seabeyond]

24. mine is chose and choose. but my pet peeve. rediculous. it is RIDICULOUS> lol. nt

[EFerrari]

26. These are great. I need serious help with thatery and the lie/lay

lecture because I STILL don't understand it. :blush:

[Ms. Toad]

54. As my MIL used to say,

"Only hens and immoral people 'lay'"

[EFerrari]

56. LOL. But what does that mean?!

Do you lay a foundation but lie on the ground?

I'm hopeless. lol

[Ms. Toad]

59. Pretty much.

"lay" is generally something you do to something else (it requires a direct object - such as "Sally" in my MILs scenario: Joe laid Sally last night, or the egg the hen is laying)
"lie" is generally something you do your self (doesn't require a direct object)

[hootinholler]

65. Lie with me because I want to lay you.

:shrug:

:hi: :* Happy new year Beth!

-Hoot

[Bette Noir]

104. "Lie" is something you do yourself. "Lay" is something you do to something else.

You lie down on a bed, but you lay a book on the table.

"Loan" and "lend" drive me crazy, too. "Loan" is a noun, "lend" is a verb. "Can you loan me a buck?" guarantees that I'll smack you in the mouth. It's, "Can you lend me a buck?"

[TicketyBoo]

121. Confusing the matter

is the fact that "lay" is the past tense of "lie."

[Pharlo]

141. You think the 'Can you lend me a buck?' is bad,

I live in a world with idiots who actually ask "Can you borrow me a buck?" Whenever I hear it, it grates on my one remaining 'Idiot' nerve. So, I respond "LEND!!! Can you LEND me a dollar?" And The Idiot will reply "Yeah, that's what I asked. Can you borrow me a dollar?" These Idiot's have no friggen clue!

I'm far from perfect, and I try to avoid correcting others, but that particular error, I have problems coping with for some peculiar reason.

[tavalon]

184. Perhaps you have problems with it because the speaker sounds like a moron.

[polmaven]

150. "Thatery"???

I am not familiar with that one. What is it actually supposed to be? :shrug:

[EFerrari]

154. Thatery is described in #3:

3. Watch Out For Whooery, Whichery and Thatery

Ken Macrorie, my mentor, taught me this tip in graduate school
. Watch how the excessive use of who, which and that can be a source of wordiness in your sentences. Here are a few examples from Ken’s book Writing To Be Read:

a. Mr. Rendew, Alice’s father, (was a man who) actually liked to have his lawnmower go wrong so he could tinker with its motor.

b. George ( is the type of man who) always shines his shoes before going downtaown.

c. (The people that) I would like to tell you about (are) Father and Mother.

http://hubpages.com/hub/Five-Classic-Revision-Techniques

[nightrain]

27. this is great, I hope the poor spellers pay attenshun

[seabeyond]

31. lol. nt

[anigbrowl]

29. Perhaps we can finally rein in those who don't realize that only monarchs reign.

That one drives me fucking crazy.

[Mariana]

89. Yeah, that one is everywhere.

I'm trying to think of just one instance in which I've seen someone write "free rein" instead of "free reign" and I'm coming up blank.

[tavalon]

187. Actually, they only reign in the rain

[proud2BlibKansan]

32. Saving to print out and hang in my classroom

After some selected editing. LOL


I love it!

[Boxerfan]

34. I'm sorry-my brain was infected years ago...I before E except after C....

Damn nursery rhyme thing messes me up every time dagnabit

[Jim Lane]

84. The expanded version of the rhyme might help.

"I" before "E", except after "C",
And when sounding like "A", as in "neighbor" and "weigh".
The exceptions are weird, and that's one of them.

[TicketyBoo]

119. Other exceptions…

i before e
except after c
or when sounded like a
as in neighbor or weigh;
and except seize and seizure
and also leisure,
weird, height, and either,
forfeit, and neither

[Odin2005]

35. I always get then/than confused.

:banghead:

[kskiska]

38. Noone will pay attention.

Then there's the mute point. Better tow the line.

[Bette Noir]

106. What does the lead singer of Herman's Hermits have to do with anything?

(Peter Noone, for those of you under 50.)

[Berry Cool]

135. I always love how people think poor Peter will do everything.

"Noone will like it." "Noone wants that." "Noone cares about you."

[Bobbie Jo]

39. LOL

Thanks for this. Can I steel it? :rofl:

[amborin]

40. wonderful! KNR

[snot]

42. Can I request one I see here ALL the time?

The difference between huge and Hugh.

[A HERETIC I AM]

45. That's not a misspelling. That's a Freeperism. n/t

[tavalon]

189. Another freeperism you will see here all the time is using

moran instead or moron. I'm almost to the point that I never spell that one right.

[jmondine]

192. Don't you mean, "all OF the time"?

[Withywindle]

46. All those drive me barking mad. My pet peeve: "Facist."

"Facist" isn't a real word, but if it were, it would rhyme with "racist" and probably denote a prejudice against ugly people, or perhaps discrimination against fully-veiled Muslim women and people in Halloween masks.

If you want to refer to the political line of thought involving militarism, dictatorship, etc., as in Mussolini, then it's "fascist."

[greenbriar]

49. I am not a great speller. I don't take the time to edit my posts

and it shows.


Funny, I can spot others but my own work not so much. I am much more careful when it is for classwork, but on here, I am bad...it is well documented. I should use the spell check more often, I would save my self a lot of grief.

[bertman]

51. Writeous, Dewd!!

[Cowpunk]

53. One more thing...OF is not a verb.

I see a lot of people using "of" in place of the word "have" or its contraction "'ve".

[Ron Green]

55. "Effect" as a verb and "affect" as a noun

These are absolutely right, but only when the meaning is right: To effect a plan, for example - to put something into effect. And "affect" meaning an emotional or psychological appearance.

[A HERETIC I AM]

58. "Nothing gets a point across like a solid kick to the hemmies"

Sometimes I need one (a kick to the hemmies, that is) just for effect.

[Kat45]

60. Rather than being misspellings, a lot of them are just using the wrong word.

The case of weird is spelling a word wrong, but they're, their, there are using the wrong word. I'm surprised they forgot to, too, two. I have a friend who is an intelligent person but never uses the correct word in that case.

[condoleeza]

61. I just get so "flustrated"...

when I am trying to decide between affected and effected. I'm such a snob about proper language, but I still struggle with that one.

[TicketyBoo]

123. Since it would be the past tense of a verb,

affected is usually correct.

[condoleeza]

172. That's my usual choice, though I still question it every time I use it.

No idea why this just doesn't sink in for me, but thanks for what you said, I'll error on affected now and be right most of the time, LOL.

[JerseygirlCT]

216. Your "flustrated" reminds me of a phrase my son

coined years back (he was probably 3 then): "pains and needles".

That works nicely, I think. Logical little man, he is.

[patrice]

62. Ooooooo! That is SO bent!! Love it! and . . .

Thanks for the help with "Lose" and "Loose" & "Effect" and "Affect"; those usually trip me up.

[patrice]

63. P.S. We need one of these on Subjective and Objective Pronoun Case!!

[CBR]

64. Guilty as charged with the word definitely...

hate that word!

[TicketyBoo]

125. I always remember that one

by remembering that it contains the word "finite."

finite — infinite — definite

[CBR]

156. Good tip! Thanks! nt

[TicketyBoo]

230. You're welcome. n/t

[hootinholler]

66. Can someone explain to me why

It is talking about wolverine fur being good for the thigh when riding them and the picture is of a person riding a manatee?

:rofl:

Whilst the author has a grasp of spelling and grammer, perhaps they should get some animal flashcards.

-Hoot

[A HERETIC I AM]

85. He is pissed off because he is stuck riding a Manatee to school while Randy

gets to ride a Wolverine!

It is the perfect illustration of the unsuitability of large, slow aquatic mammals as school transport. Everyone knows that small, ferocious woodland mammals provide much better rides. Also, while you're in school and your Wolverine is chained to the bike rack, it can munch on the bike tires of the kids you don't like. A Manatee would just lay there and try to sweat.

[hootinholler]

96. Effin DUH!

Cheese and Rice!

:rofl:

I blame the caffeine not kicking in yet.

Yeah, that's the ticket.

-Hoot

[patrice]

98. ROFL! ". . . just lay there and try to sweat."

:rofl:

[Bette Noir]

108. "Lie there." See multiple posts above.

[A HERETIC I AM]

116. See my post #47

I'm STILL a doofus!

[TicketyBoo]

126. Oops.

Can I be the Spelling Nazi in just this one thread?

(It's grammar.)

[PSzymeczek]

210. There's another one!

Grammar, not grammer.

[lonestarnot]

67. And can we stop saying gotten, oh fuck it.

:P

[patrice]

69. And ". . . could of . . . "

[Unca Jim]

81. Gotten O'Fuckit

Sounds like a Leprechaun. That is all.

[A HERETIC I AM]

117. Or the name of a Leprechaun Rock and Roll band.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, Please welcome to the stage...


GOTTEN O'FUCKIT"

[TexasObserver]

70. Should be required reading.

[Leftist Agitator]

71. If you misspell any of these words, you're a fucking retard.

That is all.

[BrklynLiberal]

74. Really funny and really smart. Great site. thanks for the headsup.

:thumbsup:

[tridim]

78. Someone post that on FR quickly.

[Unca Jim]

80. Bought it!

It'll be going up right next to my "Bob the Angry Flower" Uses of the Apostrophe poster.

[countryken]

86. Just say 'no'

Just say no to hammer pants?

It should be:

Just say 'no' to hammer pants.

A sign at the local batting cages drove me crazy. It read:

"For the kid's in the community."

I felt like buying some white paint to correct it.

[defendandprotect]

87. Good reminders . . .

but, sadly, in the haste of making replies things getting kinda phonetical

and you don't always catch the error in time!

[Jeff In Milwaukee]

91. These are good rules, alright....

Go ahead. Vent.

Edit: Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to spend the next 24 hours straight reading this guys site. And I suggest you do the same.

[burning rain]

92. Funny! & good illustrations. There's also "are" for "our" & "should of" for "should have."

Plenty of solecisms under the sun.

[patrice]

99. And plural "their" for singular "his or her" anything.

[TicketyBoo]

128. You know,

I almost think that "their" for "his or her" should become accepted usage. "His or her" is so clunky. "Their" has a much better flow and is less disruptive to the sentence.

I know it's wrong, but it is one error I sometimes make consciously when referring to someone of unknown gender, even though I know that it is not correct.

[caraher]

142. I've seen it claimed that "their" is now standard usage in such cases

Of course, we have no Royal Academy of American Standard English to appeal to for a final ruling...

[PSzymeczek]

211. Exactly

Descriptive, not prescriptive.

[Karenina]

144. It IS accepted usage. Usage trumps ALL.

No point in railing about what's correct or not once common parlance has taken hold.

[TicketyBoo]

157. Well, I'll be darned.

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/their

I will no longer feel guilty when I use it that way. (At least, I'll feel less guilty.)

[JerseygirlCT]

218. Like Facebook.

There's got to be some way they can get around that, don't you think?

[JerseygirlCT]

217. Oh yes! "Of" is not a verb! nt

[Uncle Joe]

93. I still have the most trouble with affect/effect.

This is good, thanks for the thread, A HERETIC I AM.:)

[A HERETIC I AM]

95. Glad you liked it!

I am certainly guilty of many of them, but I thought the illustrations were clever and funny.

I'm happy you and so many others thought so too.

Happy New Year!

[Martin Eden]

94. LOOSE s/b LOSE is my pet peeve

I've seen it so often on the internets I thought maybe I was out of the loop on an inside joke like morons/morans or huge/hugh.

[Arkansas Granny]

130. My favorite misuse of those words is a tattoo that a former neighbor had that proudly proclaimed

he was "Born too loose". Sad, but true.

[TygrBright]

175. Dang. Get the dude some kaopectate. The industrial-size bottle. n/t

[Martin Eden]

236. Could have been meant as a double entendre

If a woman had that tattoo I'd suspect nymphomania.

[Arkansas Granny]

240. Naw, this guy wouldn't have known a double entendre if he had been formally introduced to one.

[Catshrink]

100. I'd love to have a poster of this in my classroom

but there are rules about cuss-words and booze references. Unfortunately.

[raging moderate]

107. "Accept" versus "Except"

This may help somebody:
We ACCEPT a prize, EXCEPT when there are strings attached.
I really think this could have been avoided through more precise pronunciation by those who are lucky enough to have encountered extraordinary teachers, librarians, and clergymen. It really has little to do with money; my family frequently didn't get enough to eat, but we had a few of these wonderful people in our neighborhood. They showed us thast the spelling system, although admittedly complicated by the checkered history of England and the U.S., does make more sense than a first glance would suggest, if you know the derivations and relationships of the words. If you listen to the movies made in the 1930's, the diction was much more clear. Since then, carelessness has become fashionable. Maybe the motive behind this drive was to be more egalitarian, but it does have its drawbacks. When everybody says "gonna" instead of "going to" (including college presidents), and "UHSEPT" instead of either "ACcept" or "EXcept," it is no wonder that so many people have trouble keeping these things straight.

[TicketyBoo]

163. My father is the only person

I have ever heard pronounce "accept" as "UHsept." Even when confronted with the dictionary, he insisted he was correct and the dictionary was wrong! He could not accept that "accept" and "except" would be pronounced so similarly.

[Bette Noir]

101. Brilliant.

Now, please teach the unwashed masses (this includes authors, editors, and TV personalities) the difference between gantlet and gauntlet, and eminence and immanence. Those drive me crazy.

[TicketyBoo]

160. And imminence.

I don't recall ever having seen the word "gantlet," but dictionary.com says it's an acceptable spelling for "gauntlet," at least in some instances.

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/gantlet

[PSzymeczek]

212. It's "imminence."

And "imminent."

[A HERETIC I AM]

241. A couple I hear on TV all the time..

are "chomping at the bit".

WRONG! Horses don't "chomp" at a bit. They "champ". It is "champing at the bit".

Another is "forte'"

It isn't pronounced "for-tay"

It rhymes with "torte" or "fort".

Drives me nuts.

[Z_I_Peevey]

102. Quick, an addendum for martial and marshal!

And marshall, for that matter.

Martial law.

Marshal Dillon.

Marshall's Department Store.

[malaise]

109. Excellent

and tres funny.

[pleah]

110. K&R :)

[ddorrell]

120. My pet peeve?

I always thought "give" was a fine word. When did "gift" become a verb and why?

[pleah]

132. Mine is when someone axes me a question.

I really, really hate that.

[patrice]

239. I'm trying hard to be nice about that one; bugs the hell out of me, especially when I know that they

know better.

It's different than the various definitions of the word "fuck," because it's an entirely different word from the original "ask." I suppose it is comparable to different uses for the letters h, o, m, and e, i.e. "He went home" and "'ts up, home," but that brings up questions about whose sub-group sets usage (Why not we "grammar/spelling police" rather than other sub-groups?).

[pleah]

245. I don't correct people for their spelling or grammar. I simply stated on of

my pet peeves.

[Berry Cool]

136. When advertisers started telling us that if we ordered from them we'd get a "free gift!"

Because, you know, nobody wants a gift you actually have to pay for.

[polmaven]

152. Probably just before "friend" became a verb.

Actually, the verb giftlikely was fodder for the verb friend{/i].

And, come to think of it, they may both have been spawned by the verb medal.

[polmaven]

153. Probably just before "friend" became a verb.

Actually, the verb giftlikely was fodder for the verb friend{/i].

And, come to think of it, they may both have been spawned by the verb medal.

[pansypoo53219]

113. what's their/there/they're opinion of

ain't?

[Oldtimeralso]

115. To Hell With You Spelling Nazis. I Use Spellchecker and

eye no eye maid know miss steaks!

[cry baby]

118. Independent, not Independant

does anyone ever look too long at a word that is spelled correctly and it starts to look funny, like it isn't spelled correctly? I did it just now with my own post! ARGH!

[PSzymeczek]

213. Happens to me

all the time.

[tjwash]

122. Spell-checkers are awesome...everybody should use won.

[rd_kent]

124. What about "ANYWAYS"? Its ANYWAY ....no "s"

[woofless]

127. Whether. In Elements Of Style, Strunk and White state

that "or not" is implied in the word whether, and should not be used. Redundant?

[nuxvomica]

170. Thank you

That's one of my pet peeves.

[daggahead]

129. People think I'm weird for preaching exactly what is on this poster. n/t

[Arkansas Granny]

131. I'm surprised that "to" and "too" didn't make the list.

I see them confused as often as any of the other words on the list.

[jmondine]

191. Actually, it's "to" "too" "two" and "2"

[Berry Cool]

133. This is great. I want a poster of it.

I would also add about a million other words or phrases: everything from "free rein" (not "free reign") to "vocal cords" (not "vocal chords").

But, to add: There are some tricky ones that just go against logic that you just have to memorize and know, because there's no logic that will tell you they are right. Such as:

restaurateur: That's right, no "n." I remember it by thinking "There's a rat in the restaurant."

tendinitis: That's right, it really is "tendon" but "tendinitis." Don't ask me why. It just is.

[Libertas1776]

134. I never have a problem with any of those words, except "weird."

That's wierd isn't...er, I mean weird...isn't it?

[A HERETIC I AM]

139. Uh oh. Another Dolphin just got whacked. n/t

[Libertas1776]

140. Oh well,

my tuna just got meatier :sarcasm:

[Texano78704]

137. Till is *not* a preposition

I have seen it used that way in news articles. Un-fucking-believable! If you want to shorten "until," do it properly, 'til or just til.

[nuxvomica]

171. Actually, it is a preposition

According to the American Heritage Dictionary:

"Till and until are generally interchangeable and each is appropriate to the highest level of usage."

It would be incorrect, however, to use til without the apostrophe.

[Odin2005]

173. It is in the UK.

IIRC "till" is standard in the UK, "until" is standard in the US

[Bucky]

238. Until and Till are two different (albeit synonymous) prepositions

Ah, shit, now I'm woried about weather I speled synonymous write.

[AsahinaKimi]

143. Thanks so much for these

I am guilty for forgetting to put an "'" on You're. Sometimes I get lazy. But I really like this and will post this link on Facebook so my friends can learn from this.

[Liberal_in_LA]

145. nice!

[BlancheSplanchnik]

146. as a grammar nazi

I wholeheartedly recommend this post. A lot!

:thumbsup:

[ZombieHorde]

147. I always have to pause with "chose" / "choose" and "manner" / "manor." nt

[AlbertCat]

149. This seams to be a waist of thyme!

I can't believe they left out "to", "too" and "two" (They also forgot "yore")

And "Who" and "Whom"... but I guess that's more grammar than spelling.


Of course the great thing about English is you're not supposed to speak it correctly... or rather, one can use incorrect grammar and stuff as a stylistic tool. (You can in any language but English seems to encourage it)

[hugo_from_TN]

151. Lose up to 40 pounds, or more!

I hear that on the radio every morning and it steams me.


Also if you agree strongly with someone's statement, you say "Hear, Hear". NOT "Here, Here". Ugh.

[Midlodemocrat]

155. Hey, you! Happy Holidays!!

Hope you're well.

:hug:

[A HERETIC I AM]

164. AWWW!! Thanks, sweetheart!! You too!

I'm hanging in there.

It is my sincere hope that all of the best things the new year has to offer will bless you and your family!

Have a happy, happy New Year.

Beer and Bourbon shots, very little gas in the car...the internet and a good movie waiting in the DVD player.

I'm all set!

:toast: :hug: :pals:

P.S. Stay out of trouble in the lounge, for fucks sake! How naughty do you have to be to get suspended IN THE FUCKING LOUNGE?

(You DID get suspended a while back, didn't you? Or am I thinking of someone else?)

[PSzymeczek]

214. It's fuck's sake.

Unless there is more than one fuck, in which case it's "fucks'".

[A HERETIC I AM]

220. May a cranky Manatee...

lead a herd of cows harboring alien parasites descend on your liquor cabinet.

After they're settled in, here's hoping a Wolverine overloaded with the extra skin cells of a drunken, goat riding kitten clinging to it's fur after an extensive exfoliating session stand quietly by your ice bucket as you make cocktails for your New Years guests.

Whew.

That wasn't easy, I'll have you know.

[undergroundnomore]

159. whell awlright

thank u verry much. Its never hyrt me none not noing how two spell.

[A HERETIC I AM]

167. TO ALL OF YOU who have commented and glanced at this thread...

I'm so happy it has been so well received. Thanks for all the comments and the laughs.

To all my fellow DU'rs, may you all have a happy and safe New Years celebration. May all the highest promise a new year offers be visited on you and your families.

Keep the comments coming as long as this continues to strike a funny bone!


All the best,

Paul.

[Jakes Progress]

168. Poeple who mssspell are jest a bunch of sillys. nt

[Demoiselle]

169. Brilliant! Thank you.

[Rosa Luxemburg]

174. Seperate - separate

[SpookyCat]

177. If you don't mind, may I offer this little memory aid?

And thank you so much for this thread, it's wonderful!

******************

Preposition Doodle.


Preposition Song (Yankee Doodle)

about, above, across, after
Yan-kee Doo-dle went to town

against, along, around
Ri-ding on a p-ony

as, at, before, behind, below
Stuck a feath-er in his cap and

beneath, beside, between
Called it mac-a- ro-ni.

beyond, by, down, during, for
Yan-kee Doo-dle keep it up

from, in, into, near, of, on
Yan-kee Doo-dle dandy

o- ver, past, through, throughout, to
Mind the mu- sic and the step

toward, under, until, up, with
And with the girls be han-dy.

[Tx4obama]

178. List of homophones

Here's a link to a website with a huge list of homophones
just click on the LEFT side of the page on a 'letter' to see the lists
http://www.homophone.com/

And here's another good list that has sentence examples:
http://esl.about.com/od/engilshvocabulary/a/hom_a_e.htm

[Tab]

179. Agree fully - and one addition

Although I'm an inveterate mis-user of "its" and "it's", and I did editing for years. I'm still working on it.

The missing one I refer to is "irregardless". There is no such thing. There's "irrespective", or "regardless", but not "irregardless".

[mzmolly]

180. Guilty

as charged. ;)

[ProudDad]

181. A puppy dies of a heart attack...

every time someone incorrectly conjugates the verb "to be"!!!

:puke:

[LWolf]

185. I guess this poster wouldn't be appropriate

for my middle school classroom, lol.

If I were to make a list, lose and loose would be #1. My students, though, do a better job with all those on the poster than most DUers, because I don't let them get away with it.

[Mad_Dem_X]

188. I love it!

I know quite a few people I could send this to.

[jmondine]

193. If it's an 800 pound bottlenose dolphin, it could really screw up your jet ski.

[jmondine]

195. Do not use run-on sentences you just look stupid.

[jmondine]

196. Oh, and incomplete sentences.

[patrice]

234. Unless you're Cormac McCarthy, or some other such talent

[jmondine]

197. Do not make redundant statements that say the same thing twice.

[jmondine]

198. Don't double post.

[KamaAina]

199. Mormon.

Member of a religious sect founded by Joseph Smith in the 19th century.

Always spelled with two m's, including one in the middle, except when they pull crap like pouring millions of dollars into Prop H8.

[jmondine]

200. Don't double post.

[Moosepoop]

202. "Less" vs "fewer"

Those get used incorrectly all the time.

[rantormusing]

205. Do you have a link for one with commas

Much appreciated

[BobTheSubgenius]

215. I realize it's not actually a word, but this one drives me crazy.

"Oppps." As in: "Oppps, I dropped it."

How the hell can you get that one wrong? Even if one is not a good speller, there are still a few rules of pronunciation that hold up, no matter what.

And now...off to the court to shoot a few hoppps.

[rhett o rick]

219. You elitist basturd.

jk

[A HERETIC I AM]

221. Hardly. The only reason I posted this in the first place...

was because the image of riding a manatee to school and goat riding kittens was too cool to pass up.

Not to mention cows eating rancid casserole.

:evilgrin:

[rhett o rick]

223. So that's how you spell casserole. nt

[emcguffie]

224. This is brilliant. How about agreement between subjects and predicates?-

If only they (he, she or they?) would something similarly brilliant on agreement between subjects and predicates. You know, those predicates that agree with the nearest noun instead of with the subject?

I hear it all the time. It seems I never hear verbs agree the way they should anymore. Of course, they do it differently in UK.

Sorry, I cannot think of a funny example right now.

[PatrynXX]

225. Don't try to get me to spell Guaranty please

that is misspelled :P Even on typing tests at temp agencies. Get it wrong almost 99 % of the time. Warranty, just fine with that. Dominique Moceanu just fine with her name :P


hopefully we won't get the Shits Vs the Sunni's wrong. oh wait. Shiites. (sorry if I offended any shiites out there)
I've been censored on some pages using Shiites in a sentence. Kinda like trying to say Fuk. :P


If your on twitter this shoulnt aply suld it?

[demodonkey]

227. And learn how to use "lie" and "lay"...

...Lay takes an object. If Jesus was "laying" in a manger, what was he laying? EGGS???

[TicketyBoo]

231. Someone else

already mentioned that.

[patrice]

235. The problem there is that the spelling of the present tense, lie, is counter-intuitive and

the PAST tense of the irregular verb "lie" IS "lay".

"As shepherds lie asleep on the hill, Joseph stands watch, Mary sleeps and Jesus lies in a manger" and "As shepherds lay asleep on the hill, Joseph stood watch, Mary slept and Jesus lay in a manger" are both correct, depending upon whether you are talking about events in the present or in the past.

However, this darned irregular verb makes "They saw Jesus laying in a manger" into "They saw Jesus lying in a manger."

One wonders, if we are going to prioritize usage for "their" instead of "his" or "her" or "his or her," at what point does usage become the standard for lay vs lie or for any of the transgressions listed above?

When/Where do you draw the lines? That's why, even though I don't always get it right and end up inadvertently making usage the standard, I much prefer accuracy, especially in logic. A singular person should not suddenly be referred to as a plural, especially in contexts that include ESL users. One good way to avoid the problems associated with that particular usage is to just avoid indefinite references.

[csziggy]

233. This graphic keeps the info handy for most of these!

[niyad]

243. kick for any who might have missed this wonderful piece

[LouKneeLib]

244. hahaha

Instant classic! LOL