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Let's drink to '09 with a good belt of wine
(though whiskey may well be more fitting!)
The recession was hairy, the swine flu scary,
and Oprah announced she was quitting
While we loved Lady Gaga, the Octomom saga
struck many as shameless and wrong.
We witness the rift between Kanye and Switft, and Phelps was caught smoking a bong!
When a pilot's quick brian
saved his passenger plan on the Hudson,
The tale was a thriller.
The Balloon Boy was phony as rubber baloney.
The abs on the werewolves were killer!
A governor's flame was an Argentine dame,
bringing scandal to South Carolina.
There were pirate attacks and there was
Goldman Sachs, There was poisonous drywall
from China.
The Prez was sworn in and he flashed us a grin
while exuding his usual charms.
Though some thought it was shady,
the stylish First Lady asserted
her right to bare arms.
While Michelle was in Vogue,
Sarah Palin went Rogue, and
political tensions were showing.
With the gathering storm over
health care reform,
the Tea Party movement was growing.
The Hollywood crew gave us "Transformers 2,"
while "UP" was a true work of art.
There was Bruno (a jerk!)
plus a young Captain Kirk and
and overweight mall cop named Blart.
Those admen on "Mad Men" were
sexy-yet-sad men with
lives full of pressure and toil.
Adam Lambert came out,
leaving no shred of doubt,
and who didn't love Susan Boyle?
O'Brein shone bright
as the star of "Tonight"
Stephanopoulos stepped in for Sawyer.
And of course a divorce
was so quickly in force as
we watched "Jon and Kate Plus Her Lawyer!"
When a huge SUV hit
a hydrant and a tree
and the juiciest rumors proved true,
The endorsements went wining,
for that kind of swinging
just wasn't the Tiger we knew!
And Pop lost its King!
What a terrible thing
for an artist with hit after hit!
There were songs and orations
with loud lemantions,
for everyone knew This was It.
There were others as well who
went out, sad to tell.
We saw Cronkite and Kennedy fall.
Bea Arthur is gone,
Ed McMahon has passed on,
and Mary left Peter and Paul.
With the passing of Farrah
we ended and era
and Soupy and Swayze went too.
DeLuise said goodbye as
did Oxy-Clean Guy and
the soft-spoken star of "Kung Fu."
Yet some news was brighter
and made us feel lighter
in spite of our sorrows and peeves.
There was Google Wave chat and
a keyboarding cat.
There were trendy new blankets with sleeves!
Though we still can't erase
all the troubles we face
from the climate to high unemployment,
Let's be of good cheer
and they won't interfere with our
holiday fun and enjoyment.
We'll turn from the news to
whatever we choose,
be it Lifetime or ESPN.
And after a break
we'll be ready to take
the big plunge into Two Thousand and Ten!
Wishing YOU all the best of everything good in the New Year.
(Unfortunately, the source is unknown, so proper credit cannot be given)
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