President Obama doesn't need a report card; he needs a parent teacher conference.

[Bucky]

Note to Parents/Guardians

January 20, 2010

Dear Mrs Obama:

We are requesting that you bring Barack in for a Student-Parent-Teacher conference as soon as possible. While he is not at risk of failing just yet, there are a number of troubling signs in his performance, academically speaking, that we would like to see corrected before they cause irreparable harm to his long term prospects. Sadly, this has to do with more than just his unfortunate choices in what friends he associates with--we should not make the mistake of blaming every unfortunate incident on how he is sometimes egged on by young Rahm in his homeroom class.

Things are not all bad, of course. It is still quite a delight to have your child in class. Young Barack is a bright student with a great deal to offer his fellow learners. Unfortunately, like many gifted students, he has become accustomed to getting by with his strong verbal and social skills in previous grades and is thus not quite realizing his full potential here in the more rigorous learning environment at the School of Hard Knox.

As you know, your child will be facing important mid-semester evaluations this coming November and it is important that your child buckle down and get his homework completed long before this deadline arrives. It would be a real tragedy if Barack needed to spend the rest of his tenure at this learning institution mired down in make-up classes as offered by our excellent remedial staff instructors, Mr Boehner and Coach McConnell.

Although he will still complete his full courseload in his academic career at the School of Hard Knox and graduate from the mandatory four-year schedule here, I can assure you that his learning experience will not be nearly so rewarding under their tutelage. Furthermore, if they are the ones teaching him after the mid term evaluation, there is the distinct possibility that Barack will not wish to continue his studies for an additional four year degree at the Graduate School of Hard Knox.

Again, let me reiterate how much our school appreciates young Barack's enthusiasm. Indeed, we all admire him for taking on such a demanding course load this semester. While he's demonstrated a great command of the course content in Speech, Health Administration, Social Studies, and Finite Mathematics, I am afraid his total performance as a learner at this institution will require a greater effort in his other classes: Vocational Development and Full Contact Athletics. Furthermore, I am recommending that he acquire a tutor in American History. Barack will do well to learn from the example of a recent graduate from our school, Mr William Clinton, who, for very similar reasons to what Barack is now facing, was forced to spend six years in our remedial program. Although young William's final academic performance was deemed "satisfactory" we still have to look back at his academic career and wonder what else he might have accomplished if he had avoided so many errors in his freshman year.

Please have a frank discussion with Barack as soon as possible. It is a difficult and demanding course of study he's undertaking and so very much rides upon his eventual success in this field.


Sincerely,


Johnny Come-Lately,
Academic Questioner, School of Hard Knox

[MindandSoul]

1. Excellent!

[knitter4democracy]

2. Yes. K&R.

[Bucky]

3. 12 Rs, but only 2 Ks. What's wrong with me?

It's normally the other way around when I post.

[bobbolink]

5. Nothing wrong with you at all.... I'm kicking yours, so please kick mine...

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x7524308

Just a lot of different words on the same topic, I'm guessing.

Lots of emotions running high....

Ya done GREAT!

[appal_jack]

7. good, but

Good post. Irony-rich.

But I would argue that Obama has not come close to excelling at Health Administration.

:(

-app

[Bucky]

11. He got an "I" for incomplete in that subject.

Seriously, though, he was dead wrong when he said he could be "the last president to deal with" healthcare reform. We'll be tweaking this system for the next 20-30 years. We're two generations behind where every other industrialized country is in delivering quality healthcare services to their people. It was never going to be something that could be accomplished in one go-round.

What we'll see in the eventual bill won't be that different for last night's loss, I don't think. But to think we'd get right in one year what it took most of Western Europe 30 years to iron out was never a realistic goal.

[Winterblues]

4. Kick for cuteness

:kick:

[Bucky]

15. You think I'm cute? Awesome!

Do you like Chinese food?

[Winterblues]

21. I do like Chinese food...

I like dancing in the rain, drinking pina colotas. making love at midnight..:-)

[Bucky]

41. OK, doing great. 2nd question, are you in that part of Alaska w/in driving distance of Houston?

And finally, cause we're on a roll here... How well do you handle being disappointed in the sack?

Oh, man, I'll bet I'm on my way to finally having a date!

[Fearless]

6. He needs a tutor that isn't a fan of corporatism.

[Mithreal]

8. JUST WOW!

Maybe having written actual report cards and notes home to parents I appreciate this more than it deserves, but I don't think so.

Bravo

:applause:

I envy the writing talent on display here.

[Bucky]

10. No, I'm a fellow traveler too. I not only write notes like this to parents...

I've also received quite a few from my own "gifted but not living up to her potential" child. Come to think of it, I may have caused my own parents to receive a couple of these along the way, too.

[Faryn Balyncd]

9. K and R

[stray cat]

12. With parents like DU he would have been better off aborted

[Bucky]

14. *spit take*

I have no idea how to respond like that. Either you're brilliantly twisted in your sarcasm or your a Freeper-Forrest Gump hybrid possessed by the ghost of Oscar Wilde.

[freddie mertz]

57. Don't worry. Just an eruption of gas from the BOG.

Your piece is both funny and pointed.

Classic satire.

[Myrina]

13. K&R - this is AWESOME!

:applause: Brilliant! :applause:

[Kall]

16. Awesome

Love it.

The problem is that I'm not sure Obama is inclined to change course even if he understands why people are pissed.

[SammyWinstonJack]

34. Understands? I think he does and doesn't care much.

:shrug:

[Bucky]

37. I think you're wrong. The problem with Obama is, as Sarah Palin pointed out last year...

...he's a Chicago politician.

He came out of an environment in which wheeling and dealing, trade offs and handshakes, ruled the day. I may trash you out on the campaign trail, but once we're all inaugurated then it's time to split our differences and run the government as best we can. He values compromise and really thought the Republicans believed it when they said they wanted Washington to be a more civil place.

Clinton (with Newt's help) showed the world in 1998 that Republicans would literally rather shut down the government than come to an honest compromise. They only behaved when Clinton won the PR wars and they were at risk of being held accountable for their anti-government policies. It really is dysfunctional.

[Piewhacket]

17. Damn! LOL

[PufPuf23]

18. Very cute but sad

Barrack has chosen too many DLC, Bush holdovers, and corporate merrygorounders for his confidants.

Barrack tends to ignore and insult the more thoughtful and progressive of his classmates who had the most hope and support for his role as student body president.

Hopefully, this tendency is an error due to his sudden rise in popularity and not a psychopathic personality disorder.

We hope for the best but should discuss these issues and make intervention and contingency plans should Barrack not listen and represent his classmates who put him in office on moral values more than partisanship.

Sincerely, Barrack's Study Hall Monitor

[varelse]

19. At first glance this looked like another bashing post

I'm glad I decided to read it - cute, funny, on message, and original - nicely done :)

[Bucky]

32. Thanks.

I try not to be one dimensional. But I do love beggin' for a few recs when I can.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

20. Well, at least it doesn't call him "boy."

But the thought still counts.

[Forkboy]

23. Are there any other cards in your deck?

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

24. I calls em like I sees em.

It's not really a game though.

[Forkboy]

25. No, but you do your best to make it one.

[SaveOurDemocracy]

27. Let him play with himself, Forkboy

:hi:

[Number23]

28. I was thinking the same thing. What a patronizing piece of crap this letter is

[Bucky]

30. Sorry you don't get the metaphor.

I'd be interested in hearing your critique.

[Number23]

33. So because I think this letter is patronizing and disrespectful, that means (in your head)

that I don't "get" it or its meaning? What is there to get?? It looks pretty obvious in its patronizing idiocy to me.

Edit: Did you write this yourself or did you just copy and paste it from somewhere??

[Bucky]

35. No seriously, quit clowning around. I'm sincerely asking you what your critique is.

It's gotten 56 recs (or 56 more recs than unrecs). Someone must see some merit here. So, rather than just repeating your label of "patronizing", I'm asking for some focused feedback. In what way is it patronizing?

[Number23]

36. You allude to the fact that the President needs to be taken to the woodshed by his mama

and some non-descript "teacher" as if he were a disobedient or stupid child instead of a highly intelligent grown-assed man for a parent-teacher conference and you don't understand why that could be construed as patronizing?

And 56 recs?? Who cares?? I've seen a whole lot worse get a whole lot more in the recs department.

Edit: If you did write this, I apologize for calling it crap but I won't be kicking this thread again.

[Bucky]

38. For the record, yes, I wrote it.

If you think it's crap it's crap no matter who wrote it. If it's patronizing to the president, I'd remind you I, as a voter in a democracy, am literally his patron.

[pundaint]

58. Maybe if he didn't try to hang around with all those big kids, who got us here, he'd look more manly

Don't watch him on TV for a while, his leadership shrinks to almost nothing. Try it, you'll see.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

60. horseshit. nt

[humbled_opinion]

22. Nicely Done...

Send it to the White House.

[SaveOurDemocracy]

26. LOL ... very clever. KICK & R :o)

[annabanana]

29. Well done, Bucky

(any relation?)

[Bucky]

31. Thanks!

I don't know how I got the name Bucky, actually. But I assure you my feelings toward beavers are not familial.

[bertman]

39. Now that was really GOOD!! Rec.

It's apparent that your mom had a few of these from your school days that were stashed in her dresser drawer.

;-)

[midnight]

40. This is over the top funny....

[Canuckistanian]

42. "School of Hard Knox"

:rofl:

[gtar100]

43. That's right on the money.

[xchrom]

44. Recommend

[FrenchieCat]

45. He's just a boy.

[donheld]

46. Oh Stop!

:crazy:

[donheld]

47. k & R

[Vidar]

48. Excellent. Recommended.

[vw-fixer]

49. Just because he's . . .

gone from a B+ to a solid B- doesn't mean the parents have to be called into action yet.

[Bucky]

50. I just want to make sure we don't have a repeat of President Ferris Bueller's administation

Remember how much shit he used to give Professor Stein? The poor man had a nervous breakdown & turned into a ranting loon.

  http://ateam.blogware.com/Ben_Stein_Expelled!.jpg

[bigwillq]

53. Hello.

Welcome to DU! :hi:

[newtothegame]

51. Nance Greggs conspicuously absent from doing a report card on President Obama. n/t

[bigwillq]

52. Awesome!

K and R Thanks for posting. :rofl:

[Orsino]

54. He needs a visit to the front lines of the class war.

I don't demand instant change, and I don't even mind so much that he has to hide whatever progressive notions he holds, but a little more sense of urgency would certainly be appreciated. People are hurting now, and have been for decades/centuries/millennia.

[CBR]

55. This is just down right patronizing. I agree with the posters above

who indicated a "boy" tone to the whole thing.

[Bucky]

56. Sorry that your mileage varied. I can tell you as a teacher we're a very patonizing lot.

I don't see how this is more patronizing than any of the other posts about "Obama's Report Card" -- just a little more fleshed out. But again, if we all agreed on humor, there wouldn't be any point to being edgy.

On the other hand, with regard to the charge of "boy" tone, if anyone is reading racial prejudice into this, I'll suggest it's a matter of psychological projection. This is how teachers talk to all parents. Some people, I'm afraid, just want to be offended and look for any opportunity.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

62. Just how often do you patronize 48 year old black men?

[David Zephyr]

59. K&R.

Perfectly put.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

61. funny & poignant. esp the reference to bill clinton.

[JDPriestly]

63. Brilliant! I hope this goes viral.

[Bucky]

64. Not unless you email to someone. I emailed it to my dad, but I really don't know anyone else.

[gateley]

65. K! nt