Competition for stoopid? FHP: Driver lacked razor-sharp focus

[babylonsister]

:crazy:

FHP: Driver lacked razor-sharp focus
BY ADAM LINHARDT Citizen Staff
[e-mail]


As authorities nationwide warn motorists of the dangers of driving while texting, Florida Keys law enforcement officers add a new caution: Don't try to shave your privates, either.

Florida Highway Patrol troopers say a two-vehicle crash Tuesday at Mile Marker 21 on Cudjoe Key was caused by a 37-year-old woman driver who was shaving her bikini area while her ex-husband took the wheel from the passenger seat.

"She said she was meeting her boyfriend in Key West and wanted to be ready for the visit," Trooper Gary Dunick said. "If I wasn't there, I wouldn't have believed it. About 10 years ago I stopped a guy in the exact same spot ... who had three or four syringes sticking out of his arm. It was just surreal and I thought, 'Nothing will ever beat this.' Well, this takes it."

If that weren't enough, Megan Mariah Barnes was not supposed to be driving and her 1995 Ford Thunderbird was not supposed to be on the road.

The day before the wreck, Barnes was convicted in an Upper Keys court of DUI with a prior and driving with a suspended license, said Monroe County Assistant State Attorney Colleen Dunne. Barnes was ordered to impound her car, and her driver's license was revoked for five years, after which time she must have a Breathalyzer ignition interlock device on any vehicle she drives, Dunne said. Barnes also was sentenced to nine months' probation.

more...

http://keysnews.com/node/21349

[Happy Hippy]

1. Here is what I think

[petronius]

2. I was going to comment that I hope the razor was sharp at least, but then I

realized that that's probably the last place I'd want a sharp razor to be in the event of an accident... :scared:

[3waygeek]

3. Probably the only accident in Florida history

caused by a beaver.

[madinmaryland]

8. SNORT!

:spray:

[madmax]

14. double snort

[louis-t]

4. I have seen people shaving (face), reading the paper....

and one woman who was curling her eyelashes, all at 70 mph, bumper to bumper. I feel like yelling "GET UP 15 MINUTES EARLIER, YOU TWIT!"

[Ecumenist]

5. WTF? Ole girl could have cut her cooch off, for crying out loud..

Some things just don't go together and at the top of the list is driving down the highway, with a sharp implement near the "pum-pum"... Was she drunk? :shrug:

[TheCowsCameHome]

6. She should have had a Beaverlyzer ignition interlock device instead.

[dixiegrrrrl]

7. She must have a hell of a "personality"

going to meet her boyfriend while her ex husband drives from the passenger seat.

the permutations are mind boggling.

[madinmaryland]

9. Her "ex-husband" was holding the steering wheel from the passenger seat.

:wtf:

God damn! There is something really wrong with this picture!

[dysfunctional press]

11. while she was driving on a revoked license to meet her 'date'...

:wtf: squared.

[madinmaryland]

13. And why the fuck was the ex-husband going with her to meet her boyfriend??

:wtf: to the fourth!

[Mira]

10. Well no Darwin award for those two idiots,

they won't ever be drunk enough to get it on again.

I'm right, right?

[dysfunctional press]

12. it's hard to believe that the ex-husband wasn't charged with anything.

Barnes and Charles Judy were southbound in her Thunderbird at 11 a.m. when they slammed into the back of a 2006 Chevrolet pickup driven by David Schoff of Palm Bay. His passengers were a man and two women; the latter were treated for minor injuries at Lower Keys Medical Center, FHP spokesman Alex Annunziato said.

Schoff had slowed to about 5 mph to make a turn when the Thunderbird hit him, traveling about 45 mph, which was within the speed limit, Dunick said.
Barnes allegedly drove another half-mile, then switched seats with Judy, who allegedly claimed to be driving, Annunziato said.
"She jumps in the back seat and he moves over," Dunick said. "It was like the old comedy bit, 'Who's on first?' "

Burns on Judy's chest from the passenger-side airbag deploying belied their story, Dunick said. The airbag in the steering wheel did not deploy, he said.
Troopers charged Barnes with driving with a revoked license, reckless driving, leaving the scene of a wreck with injuries and driving with no insurance. Judy was not charged.

[HCE SuiGeneris]

15. I smell a new novel from Hiaasen.

Just saying... :P