I don't care

[Ohio Joe]

I thought I would share this with DU.

Back in 2003, I was living in Ohio and working at Nationwide. I was what they called a tech specialist... basically a senior mainframe programmer. A woman was hired as an entry level programmer and I recognized right away that she was the best natural programmer that
I had ever seen, she was awesome. I began offering her advice on how to code and she ate up everything I had to offer, she never once took offense at my advice but questioned me and challenged me to prove myself right... or wrong.

About a year after we started on our journey of friendship, we found ourselves sitting at a local bar, having a few beers and talking shop. After about eight or so beers... heh, we had as many good nights partying as we had days codeing... she got very serious looking and said to me "I know I can trust you so I have to tell you something."

Truth to tell... I had a moment of panic. I was expecting her to tell me she was attracted to me. Vanity, yes. To this day... and probably many more to come, she greatly enjoys pointing out what a foolish thought that was, heh.

She looked me in the eye and said "I'm gay" and then dropped her head down as though it was something wrong.

I said "I don't care".

She burst into tears and hugged me and said that it was just what she wanted to hear. I admitted what I thought she was going to say and she laughed and said she would never let me live it down. I hope she never does.

I did not think much of it at the time but the reality, as I grew to learn, is that people are persecuted for their sexuality. Fact. She was showing me an amazing amount of trust and I did not realize it at the time.

It is 2010 and she still has to hide her sexuality or face being fired. She cannot be public about who her partner is... WTF is wrong with us? I just don't get it.

[LiberalLoner]

1. I don't understand the prejudice either. I never have.

[dionysus]

2. that's sucks. but you're a good friend to her, it has to help.

[HopeHoops]

3. Good for you! Not only is that the best way to handle it, but you obviously meant it.

I'm convinced that people who have a problem with gays are simply unsure of their own sexuality (or just plain fucking stupid). The politicians who spew anti-gay shit are just mean ignorant assholes out for votes from mean ignorant assholes.

[Ohio Joe]

9. Agreed

It most certainly has to be one of the two, why else would one care who someone else was with?

[CaliforniaPeggy]

4. My dear Ohio Joe!

Good for you...

I'm so glad you didn't care...

It IS a real shame she has to hide who she really is. I don't get it either.

You are a good man, and don't you ever forget it.

:hug:

[Ohio Joe]

8. Thanks Peggy!

I love you :hug:

[Marr]

5. Where do you live? *edit*... duh... Ohio.

Pardon my slowness.

I live in Long Beach, CA, myself. I suppose it's a very gay-friendly area, but I can't imagine getting such a confession from someone about a basic facet of their personality.

[Ohio Joe]

7. I've moved to MA now

I met a number of great DU'ers in Ohio but I admit that it is a relief to be in a much more liberal state :D

[Hell Hath No Fury]

6. Thank you for being a good friend. :)

You should be honored she would share such an important part of her life with you. :hi:

I don't get it either.

When I was growing up, my divorced Mom's best friend was gay. He and his partner were like the Dads I had never known. When I was in the hospital, he came to see me. When I broke my arm, he was there with a great stuffed hippo. When I wanted to go to Disneyland, he and his partner took me and spoiled me rotten. When I graduated high school, there he was. When my sister got married, he did her hair and as well as that of all the bride maids. When my other sister had her first baby, he was there like a proud Grandpa.

Yet I had gone to a school that told me who he was was a sin and against "God's laws".

So, according them, my straight Dad who had not been in my life since I was 6 months old was okey dokey, but the man who had chosen to be in my life and had treated me, my Mom, and my family like GOLD was a perverted sinner.

Fuck. That. Shit.

I walked away from the Catholic church over this issue and never looked back.

The fact that in 2010 your friend still has to hide who she is as a human being is a sad, sad testament to the ugly strength of bigotry. :(

[YOY]

10. Fact little know to dip shit haters...lesbians are awesome drinking buddies for straight men.

There's nothing quite like getting so shlitzed that you can both talk like sexist pigs with a person of the opposite gender...

The one woman my wife doesn't mind me spending a copious amount of time with! My buddy Kate.

[Ohio Joe]

11. Ha! Very true

I could tell stories :D

[YOY]

12. I'm sure we both could.

:evilgrin: Even cooler is the fact that we enfatuate over the same Gamer gal...