Comment on the family that send their Russian adopted boy back to Russia

[bluestateguy]

I know a family that did something similar, although they were more compassionate than this dumb broad from Tennessee. My parents and I are friends with another couple, and they are Christian fundamentalists. They too adopted a Russian boy, aged 11, and he too turned out to be violent with possible issues of ADHD. Now maybe their Christian fundamentalism was not a good fit with this boy, but as I learned there were a few violent incidents with the boy and their other two kids. I believe there were also some violent incidents at his school too. At a certain point, the family decided to sign the boy over to a privately run group home, in the US, for troubled youth. They probably got in over their heads with the adoption thing, but I find their actions understandable. What this other lady did (below) is just horrible --- and that boy was younger too, only 7.


http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/04/09/american-torryann-hansen-_n_531477.html

MOSCOW — Russia threatened to suspend all child adoptions by U.S. families Friday after a 7-year-old boy adopted by a woman from Tennessee was sent alone on a one-way flight back to Moscow with a note saying he was violent and had severe psychological problems.

The boy, Artyom Savelyev, was put on a plane by his adopted grandmother, Nancy Hansen of Shelbyville.

"He drew a picture of our house burning down and he'll tell anybody that he's going to burn our house down with us in it," she told The Associated Press in a telephone interview. "It got to be where you feared for your safety. It was terrible."

Russian Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov called the actions by the grandmother "the last straw" in a string of U.S. adoptions gone wrong, including three in which Russian children had died in the U.S.

mo

[notadmblnd]

1. I cant believe that they would expect to live happily ever after

many of these children come from broken homes. I had read somewhere that this boys biological mother was an alcoholic and had given him up at age 6. Now who would expect a child whose mother is an alcoholic- to not have problems?

[Bluerthanblue]

2. the adoptive mother should be charged and arrested. There

was no excuse for this. I don't care how far in over her head she was with this child, to allow her mother to put him on a plane to Russia was more than negligent- it was criminal.

:nuke:

[GoddessOfGuinness]

3. Seems odd that his violent behavior would suddenly start

after the social worker visited in January.

3 months isn't a very long time to figure out the cause of a chid's behavioral problems. Did they consider that he might be having an allergic reaction or dietary issues? Did they seek counseling to help the boy deal with culture shock and to help them all adjust?

I'm not saying the adoption agency was blameless. It's possible the boy had serious issues that the parents were not informed of. It just seems odd...There are too many loose ends to the story.

[Karia]

4. FAS and RAD?

This sounds much worse than ADHD. Before we adopted, our agency required us to take parenting classes that included extensive information on fetal alcohol syndrome and reactive attachment disorder. Many agencies do not do that though. From what I hear from fellow adoptive parents, some of the Christian agencies do a particularly poor job of preparing people for parenting institutionalized children.

[WVRICK13]

5. Where Does The Issue Of Family

enter here? If I adopted a child, they would be my family, regardless of problems. If I was afraid for my safety, I would have taken the same measures I would have taken if the child was my biological offspring. Seek help, institutionalize them, whatever fit the situation. You can't throw people away because they are inconvenient. I wonder if this is a RW Pro-Life family.

[DailyGrind51]

6. They had no business being parents in the first place!

What if a biological child had similar problems, would they leave him by the side of the road somewhere?

[Karia]

7. What they did to the child is indefensible

I am by no means defending the mother or grandmother. I do however question the preparation they got from their agency. Were they told that love and God would get them through anything? Or were they given realistic information on FAS and RAD, and treatment programs? Was the agency there for them when the "honeymoon period" ended and the child's problems became apparent? Or were they on their own once all the fees were paid up and paperwork complete?

Some agencies are very, very good at this. Our agency is awesome, and many others are too. Yet the more I hear about certain other adoption agencies, the luckier I feel that we found one of the ethical ones.

[joeybee12]

8. Russia is claiming the child shows signs of physical abuse by these nuts in TN

No matter what, they had no business doing what they did...any RESPONSIBLE person would have tried to get help...they just carted him off like day-old bread.