My Tea Party Diary

[jaysunb]

My Tea Party Diary
A Week on the Other Side
Monday, April 12, 2010
By Les Black

(Satire)

Monday
I called Comcast today and informed them I was canceling my subscription unless they dropped CNN and MSNBC, as well as all of the other liberal mainstream media channels like PBS, ESPN, HBO, ABC, CBS, NBC, WE and most of the other stations - including all of those negro channels. I need a package that includes Fox News and a video feed of that saucy club in LA that the RNC has funded. They hung up. Damned liberals.

Tuesday
Got my acceptance letter to the Tea Party in the mail this morning. Got my picket sign kit and Joker paint set and everything! I'm so excited. Since I'm African American, a condition of my membership is attendance at a class to learn to use the “N” word as something other than a term of endearment. I seem to remember doing that at least once before, so think I'm up to the task . . .

Wednesday
Got a new contract today!! I’ve been engaged as an assistant for a Racial Epithet workshop at the next Tea Party Convention. My role there is to slap the shit out of the most effective students. Also attended my first Tea Part workshop, In this class, we learned some of the songs of the movement. This is one of my favorites . . .


Thursday
Went to switch my political party affiliation today. Yep! I was going to posse up with the Tea Party! Everything was going well until I said "thank you" to a Mexican woman who held the door open for me. My membership application was ripped up, I was promptly led out of the office, and I could've sworn I heard the word "Buckwheat" whispered under my contact's breath as he slammed the door behind me.

Trying this Tea Party thing is tough. This small government thing wasn't working for me as I realized that I was eating government approved foods, taking government approved vitamins, speaking on a phone that used government approved spectrum, riding in taxi with a government approved license ... and then saw my younger self in a group of children playing, and decided I SHOULD help them succeed.

Friday

http://ebonyjet.com/politics/national/index.aspx?id=16808

[my2sense]

1. Hilarious n/t

[jaysunb]

2. I thought so too. lol n/t