*** DUzy of the Month winner for January: jgraz***

[JeffR]

The poll for January DUzy of the Month winner garnered an astounding 102 votes, making it even more scientifically reliable than the latest Rasmussen poll for winner of the 2008 presidential election!!!111 Congratulations to this month's winner, and to the runners-up.

Note to Mods: Skinner has authorized the DUzy Awards to be posted in GD.

DUzy of the month winner with 33% of the vote:

OP by jgraz:

      Lieberman leaving humanity
Joe Lieberman Leaves Human Race, Forms Independent Species

Facing increasing opposition from within his own species, Joe Lieberman announced yesterday that he was giving up his membership in Homo Sapiens Sapiens and forming his own primate subgroup.

The new species will be known as Homo Josephus Liebermanus, or "Homentum" for short.

While it is somewhat unusual for a sitting Senator to switch species, the move was not entirely unexpected. Lieberman had been signaling his intentions for some time by engaging in such patently inhuman behavior as quashing the Senate's Katrina investigation and threatening a filibuster in support of increased troop levels in Iraq.

Members of the small Congressional Human Caucus expressed regret that Lieberman chose his current action. "We had hoped that Senator Lieberman would find a way to remain human for the duration of his term," said Senator Russ Feingold, one of the caucus' few remaining members, "but in the end, Joe just found it too difficult to reconcile his personal goals with continued participation in the human race."

For his part, Lieberman remained steadfastly upbeat about the change. "This new biological designation represents a willingness on my part to remain independent from the constraints of accepted human behavior," said Lieberman in a prepared statement. "I look forward to working across the aisle with other primates such as bonobo chimps, gibbons and Trent Lott." Lieberman then formally launched his new species with a brief male dominance display and a ceremonial tossing of his own poop.

GD, January 21, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=364x3171162

Second place, with 20% of the vote, goes to:

On a thread by tinfoilinfor2005:

      I've been out of the country for one week: Can I have a one sentence synopsis of what I missed?

response #18 by OPERATIONMINDCRIME:

      One Sentence? Ok.
Bush blah blah blah blahzee Nancy blinky Cheney no blinky Webb kick assey, block tool no morey, Baby Einstein Apocalypty, Libby no tell truthy, Hillary DU no likey, future still be scary.

...Ok. Maybe not a sentence. But shit, we ain't gettin graded on this right?

GD, January 25, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x41688

Third place, with 13% of the vote, goes to:

On a thread by RamboLiberal:

      Gibson called Obama's long-known cigarette smoking a "dirty little secret"

response #5 by MindPilot:

      They are just going to go freakin' ballistic when they find out Obama
is black.

GDP, January 18, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x3063005

Kick 'em, recommend 'em, thank 'em, love 'em!

Watch for the next weekly DUzy awards on Friday, if I get around to it.

[Swamp Rat]

1. LOL! Congratulations jgraz! ... sleep tight! ... Don't let the lizards bite!

:rofl:

[JeffR]

2. Swampy, after seeing that graphic again

How anyone could sleep tight is as inexplicable as... well, anyone who voted for Lieberman. It's creepily kick-ass.

[jgraz]

4. heheh -- you evil bastard

:spank:


:hi:

[NanceGreggs]

3. Congratulations jgraz!

That was a brilliant piece of writing!

P.S. I can ASSURE you that the voting is on the up-and-up. Even sleeping with the creator-producer of the DUzys doesn't give you a leg up -- believe me, I KNOW.

[jgraz]

14. "Even sleeping with the creator-producer of the DUzys doesn't give you a leg up"

Well there goes my plan to win next month

[jgraz]

5. Thanks JeffR -- I'll PM you my address so you can send the prize money

I promise not to spend it all in one place.

[JeffR]

7. Doubtful you'll find a store with anything priced cheap enough

for the prize money to cover the list price.

Congrats, jgraz! Great, great post.

[jgraz]

8. Jokes aside, thanks for starting this

It's a great idea and I look forward to it every week.

[JeffR]

9. Cheers! I look forward every week to DUers reminding me

there's more to the world than the nightmare Bush and his party are trying to make of everything. Thank you for going above and beyond the call of duty! Well done.

[tavalon]

12. Yes,

there's our competition for wittiest reparte. And we are witty repartiers.

[helderheid]

6. We may need to YouTube reinact these!

:rofl:

[JeffR]

10. I'm picturing a white-tie formal affair

simulcast on all networks, where each of the winners, after making a gracious acceptance speech, looks into the camera and shouts, "Ooga Booga Smooga Wooga!"

:rofl:

And dammit, helderheid, you're one of the funniest DUers I know. Git DUzyin', now. (Though maybe the award commmittee has just been manifesting its acid-casualty acumen...)

[helderheid]

15. OH I wasn't even thinking of acceptance speeches! That would be great! LOL!

OOGA BOOGA SMOOGA WOOGA! :rofl:

[tavalon]

11. I forgot to vote

but I read number one and number three in real time. And number three was a coffee spewer and a gut buster.

[jgraz]

13. I have to admit, MindPilot got my vote

Best one-liner I've read in a long while.

[smokey nj]

16. Congratulations jgraz!!!!