Witnesses: Woman slapped baby on plane

[Liberal_in_LA]

Witnesses: Woman slapped baby on plane

By the CNN Wire Staff
August 17, 2010 4:04 p.m. EDT

(CNN) -- Police in Albuquerque, New Mexico, questioned a Georgia woman after witnesses said they saw her slap her 13-month-old child during a flight, according to police reports.

A flight attendant on a Southwest Airlines flight from Dallas, Texas, to Albuquerque told police she saw the woman "strike the child with an open hand on the face in an attempt to get the child to stop crying," a police report states. The flight attendant also said she saw the mother slapping the child on her legs.

The woman appeared "agitated," the flight attendant said, and the husband was yelling at his wife to shut up due to her screaming at the child, the report states.

-------------------------


Both parents were questioned by police and then released on their own recognizance after medical personnel examined the child for injuries. The family then boarded another flight.

Another passenger told police that they heard slaps, and the mother tell her daughter to "shut up" and that "I didn't hit you that hard."

Several passengers were upset by the behavior, the flight attendant told police.

According to the police report, the woman told officers she only slapped her child after she was kicked. And she said she put her finger on the child's mouth in an attempt to get her to be quiet.

Asked if she thought it was okay to hit a 13-month-old baby, the woman nodded to police and said, "She's my daughter," according to the police report.



http://www.cnn.com/2010/US/08/17/new.mexico.flight.incident/index.html?hpt=T2

[baldguy]

1. Like inflicting *MORE* pain & discomfort will stop a child from crying.

:eyes:

Some people shouldn't breed.

[RKP5637]

3. Agree!!! Well said!!! n/t

[John Q. Citizen]

12. They only cry because they want to be slapped, you know.

[Warpy]

22. Yeah, 13 month old babies on planes can be monumentally frustrating

especially on takeoff and descent when the kid's ears start to hurt like hell.

Letting the kid suck on something will do more to equalize the pressures than slapping her would. The latter is completely counterproductive.

The flight attendants should know about this stuff and offer helpful suggestions. There's a good reason for little ones to scream on planes. Knowing how to deal with it can help parents avoid freaking out and hitting their kids.

But yes, this woman was out of control. Shame on her.

[seabeyond]

25. to be blunt, listening to posters on du talk about kids on planes and restaurants

had me discussing this with my young niece before flying out. she had a 8 month old and almost 3 yr old. and she was alone. was gonna be a hard trip. and adults have so little patience and understanding and compassion for people in this situation. all the stress and mess of her trip, and trying to do it well for her little ones to get them thru, she also knows so many people have issue with her, simply because she has little ones.

doesn't even have to get to the point of kids making any noise at all, just the sight of them causes rolling of eyes and attitude for some.

[Warpy]

32. Face it, people don't like other people's children

and are always afraid the kid will start to screech, vomit, throw a tantrum, run around wiping sticky fingers on everybody, kick seats, and generally behave like wild animals because so many of them do.

I feel for your niece, it sounds like hell on earth.

[seabeyond]

34. but, so many of them don't. i felt for her too, but she made it, lol

without incidence. a parent always has a sigh of relief.

[Mariana]

38. Plenty of people don't like their own children.

The woman in the article is one example.

[Warpy]

48. Yeah, they love them but don't like them

I'd put my own parents into that category. Still, I tend to err on the side of compassion when it's something like a baby with an earache from altitude changes and tell Mom what to do about it rather than reactive negatively to what's already a panic situation.

[AnArmyVeteran]

67. I wonder if she listens to James Dobson?

He likes to advocate striking children.

[JuniperLea]

2. I wouldn't be a witness to that...

Without being arrested myself.

Brilliant woman... yeah, smacking a baby is a sure fire way to make them shut up... idiot.

[sinkingfeeling]

4. Apparently, shaking them until their brain becomes mush or slamming them into a wall

will make them stop crying .... forever.

[JuniperLea]

18. I've heard that...

Too bad Karma isn't so instant... in a perfect world abusers like that would feel exactly what they are dishing out instantaneously! Creepy freaks.

[Odin2005]

24. I have friend who has cerebral palsy because of a babysitter with that attitude!

:puke:

[abelenkpe]

10. Same here

I once overheard a woman hit her kid a couple of times in a bathroom stall at Disneyland because he was crying and completely lost my cool. I told her if I heard her hit him again I was calling the cops and child protective services. She disappeared quickly. I've always wondered if the little guy was OK and worried she just waited until she was out of view to take her rage out on him again. :(

Some people shouldn't be parents.

[JuniperLea]

17. So sad...

But good for you for speaking up.

I gasped very loudly at dog beach last weekend when I saw a man hit his dog... he looked at me... and I just stood there with my mouth open in disbelief. I'm sure the dog has been hit since... so sad... bless the beasts and the children... :cry:

[Blue Owl]

5. She's just applying some of the new rightwing logic

Waging optional violence will stop the violence -- like in Afghanistan!

[LaurenG]

6. Slapped a baby across the face to get her to STOP crying?

Poor kid.

[Matariki]

66. "Stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about"

my parents used to say that all the time. I'm really glad that hitting kids is no longer very acceptable, like it was when I was growing up.

[AndyA]

7. Years ago, when I worked retail, I saw a Mother smack her toddler.

The kid was in one of those little buggys that had a basket in the back to hold things. The kid was really crying, and the Mother smacked it twice in a short period of time, each time it made the kid cry harder and louder, naturally.

The second time was a pretty good whack, too.

So I walked over to her and said, "Why don't you smack him harder next time, perhaps you'll knock him unconscious and then he'll shut up."

The woman told me to mind my own business. I told her child abuse was everybody's business. Another customer had called for security, who asked the woman to bring the child and come with him. He wasn't smiling.

I've wondered from time to time over the years whatever came of that kid. I hope the Mother thought twice about hitting him from that point on.

[Mariana]

41. I'm sure she did think twice

and made sure to only hit him at home after that.

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

54. Many parents love to tell people to "mind their own business".

Even when the kid grows up, becomes a marauding teenager, fucks up your business and when you seek restitution, they fight it every step of the way.

[Dappleganger]

8. Some people treat children as property.

I witnessed a mother smack her child (looked like he was 2-3 yrs. old) on his cheeks twice, enough to leave a mark, at Universal Studios during a lunch break several years ago. I gave her the evil eye and shook my head in disgust, and the mother went all off on me that this was her child and she could do whatever she wanted to with her child. They finally left and my kids just couldn't believe what they'd seen. The woman and her party seemed to be upper-middle class and of hispanic descent, but completely without the self-control a normal parent should have.

[unblock]

14. that's a common expression but i think these people would actually treat property better.

[Dappleganger]

36. Good point.

It just sickens me to hear the "but it's MY child, I can do whatever I want!" and they have no idea how precious that little life is. :(

[jesus_of_suburbia]

44. "The woman and her party seemed to be upper-middle class and of hispanic descent"

I'm sure "and of hispanic descent" was important to your story.

:eyes:



I'm also sure you would have stated her race had she been white or African American.

:eyes:

[Dappleganger]

61. I was just stating the facts.

If she was white I would have said white or if she was African American I would have noted that. Quite often culture and socio-economic status has a big influence on how one raises their children. Perhaps you missed the preface of "upper-middle class".

Of course if you are looking for a fight I'll be happy to point you in a direction...and push. ;)

[uncommon]

9. Ugh. Children are PEOPLE.

Aside from the fact that this baby was too young for that type of punishment even *if* it was acceptable at all, hitting children is so epically fucked up.

My daughter is 6 - she's not scared of me, but she knows when I am not messing around and I do not have to slap her to assert my dominance.

Hitting children is cowardly and pathetic.

[snooper2]

11. They should release the names of the parents...

and maybe city/state info as well...

[Demit]

16. Why?

[snooper2]

21. public shaming

"In recent times, judicial use of public humiliation punishment has largely fallen out of favor since the practice is now considered cruel and unusual punishment, which is outlawed in the United States Constitution. Yet, this is not clearly defined, so some judges do use shaming as a form of punishment, whereby an individual may have to parade in public with a sign explaining their behavior and misdeed."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Public_humiliation

[uncommon]

26. It is highly effective.

[Demit]

60. You might want to wait until the person has been convicted of a crime, then let the judge do that.

Or do you consider yourself sufficient to be judge & jury now?

God save us from types like you.

[damntexdem]

13. Sounds like a real solid pair of parents there.

I can't imagine why their infant would cry.

[FirstLight]

15. you are ALL missing something crucial in the story...

"The woman appeared "agitated," the flight attendant said, and the husband was yelling at his wife to shut up due to her screaming at the child,"

Many times when a woman is abused, she directs it at the children. If the husband is telling her to shut up and probably telling her to shut the KID up...she will turn her angst on the child.

Not an excuse, just needed to be noted here. Abuse runs MUCH deeper in the psyche than you can understand unless you have been there, either giving or recieving. Victims become abusers very easily, it is a fine line.

[uncommon]

19. None of that makes it acceptable or not her fault.

[seabeyond]

20. ya. i wondered about the whole dynamics too. my hubby could see when i was frustrated and would

take a walk with the child. i would do the same for him when i saw he was getting agitated. it seemed like one of us always had the patience at the time. neither of us needed the added stress of yelling or being yelled at, as the kids didnt need the added agitation of being hit to stop crying.

[Romulox]

27. Somebody probably yelled at dad at some point, too.

Women have full moral agency (just like men!).

[Odin2005]

23. backwards moran!

:grr:

[rapturedbyrobots]

28. russell peters says it best

get over yourselves.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nn5jlrxcpkI

[seabeyond]

31. that is so fuckin funny. do i look like ryans mom. thanks. nt

[hyphenate]

29. I see both sides of the argument

about physically punishing a child, both those who do, and those who coddle their kids. There are often times when a situation arises where a child uses crying and carrying on to gain something in a relationship with its mother. And the parent who allows a child to control such a situation is allowing that child to control the immediate circumstances.

Corporal punishment is the traditional way of wresting the control from the child and back to the parent, and while some will disagree as to its efficacy, I think under some circumstances it should be allowed. I don't think it's the solution to ALL scenarios, but used only under infrequent conditions, it can prove to be useful.

How many parents are inconsistent with punishing a child? The "if you don't stop that, I'm going to spank you!" most often doesn't result in a punishment of any kind, and I think it can lead to a child understanding that punishment is more often an idle threat. It doesn't help out a situation, and the credibility of a threat is nullified. The promise of punishment becomes little more than words, with nothing to back it up. And what eventually happens, is a child becomes confused when one action triggers a punishment, and the action at another time results in the child getting away with it.

You also can't punish a child for everything, and reserving only the worst transgression for corporal punishment can lead to a child understanding that smacking their sibling, harming the dog or cat, or something equally as nasty, CAN be properly punished.

This is JMHO, of course, and YMMV.




PS: I never did have any children of my own, other than the four legged type, and I I would never harm one of them. And I did have a hand with my niece's upbringing, and there were times when she understood far better than I did that she was likely never going to be punished for something she did.

PPS: I know the baby in the article was very young, and I realize that the baby was too young to be physically punished. And I also disagree with the face being slapped. Taken over a knee is a lot more useful in the long run.

[seabeyond]

33. hitting child to get them to stop is using fear. fear doesnt work. it will for the moment

but it isnt a long term mean to a child that makes the choices himself, ergo, you dont have it to deal with.

to take the time to discuss and allow child to reason it out that they WANT to follow the rules is the best long term, and so grateful when they reach the teenage years because they make the good choices because they have learned it is best for them. ultimately making parenting during teenage years so easy.

i had strong boundaries with behavior and what is allowed. way fair and they recognized. and i listened to them and respected them so they learned and appreciated. little ones need the boundaries, that is all. and you are right, consistency is the answer.

i was hit when i was little. i hated it. so i was good. brothers, didnt bother them a bet and were a pain in ass all thru the years. one brother still is.

my children have been so easy. i have never found the need to hit. and still, so easy. when feeling the frustration, that is when hitting becomes an option, and it is not parenting, it is releasing the anger and frustration.

[Dappleganger]

39. Love and limits...

that's the key. The hardest part for the parent is 1) training ahead of time instead of reacting after the fact and 2) being consistent enough to reinforce the training.

[seabeyond]

40. +1. it makes them want to not be a pain in the ass, lol. nt

[Dappleganger]

37. No child is ever old enough to be physically punished.

We have four fantastic, healthy, kind kids (18, 17, 14 and 12). They have never, ever, ever been hit, spanked, smacked on any part of their person.

[fishwax]

63. "both sides" -- those who use physical punishment "and those who coddle their kids"

For the record, refraining from hitting a child is not the same as coddling them.

[derby378]

30. Here's the mug shot

[RaleighNCDUer]

35. And, no doubt, dear hubby slapped the shit out of her for embarassing

him in public, first chance he got.

This shit does not come out of nowhere.

[Hekate]

49. That was one of my thoughts as well. Big help he was. nt

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

55. You don't think it's possible the woman was slapped as a child?

It doesn't come out of nowhere. But acting like you know who's the root of it is an assumption.

[Cleita]

42. Poor child. Her ears were probably hurting and angry parents

didn't help her comfort level. Airplane sounds and altitude hurt sensitive little ears, even in pressurized cabins. This is probably why babies cry so much on airplanes. I'm sure hitting her didn't help. That women seriously needs some parenting lessons.

[Mariana]

46. The kid was probably MORE upset

that her parents were agitated than about the pressure and noise. My 15 year old is still affected if she senses that I'm upset or angry - and she senses it every time no matter how calm I try to be in her presence.

[seabeyond]

51. +1. it does all feed into.... nt

[leeroysphitz]

43. You stay classy, Georgia woman. n/t

[HockeyMom]

45. I nursed my daughter until she was almost 2 years old

when I was in a situation where she was crying excessively, I would just nurse her to stop the cyring. Yes, even in a public place. Towels and blankets work fine. At any rate, nursing, or a bottle, is a whole lot better than SLAPPING or HITTING. Besides on a plane, during takeoff the child's ear's may be hurting. Adults can chew gun or swallow. How is an infant going to know to do that? Nursing, or a bottle, will solve that.

[Ilsa]

64. That's the best solution. The toddler usually loves it, and it relieves

the ear pain from pressure changes when flying. That woman picked the wrong solution. Hitting the kid doesn't work. Helping the child with her ear pain is more effective.

[Hekate]

47. Being confined in a tiny space and unable to move does not help, either.

My daughter is 34 years old, and her first round trip flight was when she was an infant, the next when she was about 11 months old. My family lived 3,000 miles away, and I tried to see them occasionally. Space-per-passenger was greater then, and regulations about moving around were looser as well.

As a tiny infant she needed to be nursed (baby blanket over me, easy) and changed (on the seat next to me, there being no changing station in the toilet stall). Crying was minimal -- when her ears hurt I just gave her a bust in the mouth (a joke! A Mommy Joke!!!) and she was happier.

When she was toddling it was more challenging because she needed to be entertained, but since I had planned for that, it was okay as well. She still nursed part-time, so that was okay too -- instant comfort. AND I WAS ALLOWED TO WALK AROUND WITH HER.

MY GOD I CAN JUST IMAGINE TRYING TO KEEP A TODDLER FROM CRYING WHILE STRAPPED IN FOR HOURS UPON HOURS.

JESUS CHRIST ON A TRAILER HITCH, FLYING CONDITIONS ARE INHUMANE TODAY AND ARE UNFIT FOR ADULTS, MUCH LESS SMALL CHILDREN.

There is no excuse for slapping a small child around, but airline passengers are now treated like cattle on the way to be turned into hamburger, and I wonder why more of them don't show extreme stress reactions.
:argh:

Hekate

[BellaLuna]

50. Take the kids away from them

If they do that in public what will happen at home?

[elehhhhna]

52. yeah, cuz foster farms are so much more humane.

Today, it is, sadly, a choice between awful and more awful.

[uncommon]

53. Not all foster parents are bad people - there are some amazing people out there

who take on the responsibility for other people's children every day and do it with love and selflessness and courage.

My ex-husband's parents had 4 adopted daughters who came out of the foster care system. Those children have had a wonderful life that would not have been possible with their birth parents.

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

56. My cousin and her husband are foster parents

They are caring, loving people who wanted to fully adopt several of the very emotionally shattered kids they took in. Amazing some of the leaps people here make.

[seabeyond]

57. the only story of foster i know is niece at 16 went into one. she is 22 and in the area visiting

them after 4 yrs away. i never met them. they drove from sacramento to reno to visit. i understand they communicate and chat often. she was an out of control kid. that says something.

but... that being said, i am not siding with the argument a slap or spanking means foster care. nor am i saying a slap or spanking is good parenting. or even effective parenting.

geez, did i cover the bases, lol

[Pisces]

59. Brilliant idea to traumatize the child by taking her away from her parents. Terrible parenting

but this is no reason to take the child. The majority of us over 40 on this board were abused by our parents based on today's standards. I know I was spanked and can remember a few times with the
belt. My father was paddled at school. Our parents and us are not all mass murderers or balled up in the corner crying.

The parents were uptight due to the stress of traveling with a screaming toddler. I am sure she was embarrassed by her own behavior. I would have been a lot more concerned if she was punching the child.

[BellaLuna]

62. oh bullshit

This is a 13 month old here not an year old who 'deserves' a smack on the butt. I was spanked a few times as a kid and am just fine too. However, I have the f'ing sense to know anyone who slaps a baby in the face has no business being alone with that child.

WTF is the issue of making excuses for a parent in this case? I raised a kid on my own and only spanked him twice in his life and he needed it both times. There were plenty of times I was ready to lose it but did not take it out on him.

Being abused as a child is pretty traumatic in addition to be moved from the home. Hopefully there's a relative who can help until those parents get some freaking help.

But, there's NO WAY someone slaps a baby should get away with it so save your sanctimonious judgment of what kind of parent I was - you have no idea what you're talking about.

[Jefferson23]

58. In other words, she's my property..I hit her b/c I have a right to...schmuck.

I can only hope there will be a follow up on this situation, poor baby. Nature is flawed, unfortunately babies can't pick out their
parents.

If they could, who would pick an asshole like this to call Mom?

[Pathwalker]

65. True story: I took my 2 youngest sons on a plane cross-country.

They were barely 5 & 6, and were being quite obstreperous, and difficult. The other passengers began whispering over their obnoxious behavior, until they all gasped aloud over something my youngest said: "I don't understand why you're taking us away from our Dad - I LOVE HIM!"
The whispering turned to a roar, and I figured I might be arrested, so I replied to my son, loudly enough for everyone to hear: "I love your Daddy too, son, but My Grandmother died, and I have to take you to the funeral, because your Daddy couldn't get any time off work!"

I burst into tears, and very quietly told my sons that if they didn't start behaving we would most likely end up being thrown off the plane, and would end up being stuck somewhere we didn't want to be. I somehow managed to get through that flight, and the one back home, but I have never, and will never fly anywhere again. Oh, and to the man in the seat in front of us: I,m STILL sorry my son pulled your toupe off your head.

Oh, and hitting a 13 month old baby serves no purpose whatsoever. You'll never get them to stop screaming that way, but you will end up pissing people, like me, off.

[seabeyond]

68. wait... by 5 and 6 my kids knew how to sit quietly and read a book

this is a joke of a post, right. cause i cant imagine any child that age being out of control enough to pull off a mans toupee. though i thought your post cute, i am not taking it too seriously.

if that is our option? children disturbing others or spanking, we are in a world of hurt.

[Pathwalker]

70. No, the option I chose was to talk to them quietly, explain the situation,

and tell them them that I expected better behavior from them. The fact that I burst into tears shocked my sons, as they were not used to seeing me cry. This was apparently what made them quiet down and start behaving. And yes, the toupee thing happened at the very beginning of the flight, when the man seated ahead of us leaned into our space, and said that my son had better not kick the seat in front of him, or he would...his toupee, already askew, fell forward into my son's face, and my son wanked it out of his face.

As for your last question, why must one assume that there is only ever one of two extreme options?
Since I don't believe in spanking, I tried reasoning with my children. Yes, they were rowdy at times, but they have grown up to be good citizens, with their spirits unharmed by violence from their parents. I chose option #3.

[seabeyond]

71. thanks pathwalker

it was humorous. ah, to the crying. but whatever works.

adults make it hard though, for children. that i agree.

[Enrique]

69. they discussed this on the Phil Hendrie show

if anyone is familiar with the Phil Hendrie show, you know it was discussed in an enlightening manner. ;-)