Now we have to worry about coronal mass ejections too.

[Skidmore]

Dammit, I'm in worry overload. Astroids and comets, disappearing ozone, black holes, superstorms, earthquakes, polar flipping, etc. per the History Channel. And I have to add this all on top of the general election, teabaggers, and freakin' hatemongers and peddlers of lies.

Enough is enough!

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

1. Wait, the History Channel?

Shouldn't we be more worried about Hitler's haunted UFOs?

[Skidmore]

2. Not today.

It's coronal mass ejections.

And, crap, they just reversed the poles.

[Swamp Rat]

3. No, Nostradamus's neolithic ice truckers

:scared:

[damntexdem]

11. Wouldn't those be neopaggic ice truckers?

[damntexdem]

7. No, HItler's haunted UFOs were all shot down by coronal mass ejaculations.

;-)

[myrna minx]

10. Bigfoot's secret UFO luftwaffe that ushers in the "rapture" as foretold by Nostradamus

and his ice road truckers.

[damntexdem]

12. Hey, do you know what WWII German pilots ate for breakfast?

Luftwaffles!

[cherokeeprogressive]

4. Stop Worrying About Premature Coronal Mass Ejection. Ask Your Doctor About CoronaBloc...

It desensitizes... for long lasting protection against the dread and embarrassment of premature coronal ejection, and a longer, more satisfying cosmic experience.

[damntexdem]

5. Ooh, sounds like the Sun is having kinky sex.

;-)

[Skidmore]

8. Perhaps we should ask Christine Whatsherface if such ejections are

sinful.

[pipi_k]

15. We would never know if not for the sunspots on the sheets.

:+

[provis99]

6. It's the end of the world as we know it, and I feel fine.

[rug]

9. Don't forget these.

The average life cycle for a male house dust mite is 10 to 19 days. A mated female house dust mite can live for 70 days, laying 60 to 100 eggs in the last 5 weeks of her life. In a 10 week life span, a house dust mite will produce approximately 2000 fecal particles and an even larger number of partially digested enzyme-covered dust particles.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/House_dust_mite

[RaleighNCDUer]

13. Gamma ray bursts!

You forgot gamma ray bursts!!

[HopeHoops]

14. That's what SHE said!

[Fumesucker]

16. Betelgeuse is an incipient supernova

We are lucky that the rotational axis of Betelgeuse does not align with the Earth, if it did there is a strong possibility that when Betelgeuse explodes we would get blasted with very high energy gamma rays strong enough to damage our ecosystem.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Betelgeuse#Fate

[Buns_of_Fire]

17. Now you've done it -- you said "Betelgeuse" three times! nt