Help me get through this day!

[Rainbowreflect]

I have to leave for a wedding in a few hours that I am dreading. A friend I love dearly is marrying a right-wing fundie that I cannot stand. She is a hate filled hypocrite who is already taking advantage of him. He does not want to see the truth because he is terrified of being alone. I have to get dressed up, put on a smile with my makeup and try to make it though the rest of the day without losing my mind or my friendship.
It is probably even harder for my husband as they have been best friends for more than 40 years.
We cannot just cut him out of our lives because I really think he will need us soon, but I don't like the changes I see in him. His 2 adult children cannot stand her either and have told him, he just does not want to hear it.
Thanks for letting me vent.

[unhappycamper]

1. Good Luck today, Rainbowreflect!

:hug:

[Rainbowreflect]

2. Thanks!

I am not really good at keeping my mouth shut. In fact I have already had arguments with her and members of her family.
I know I can control myself to not start anything, but I don't know if my control is strong enough to not reply if they start something.

[calimary]

3. So sorry to hear this.

Hang in there. As Jon Lovitz would say - ACTINNGGGGGG!!!!!

Sucks I know. My mom took up with a gentleman toward the end and he was very sweet to her. But his politics were in the wrong-wing sewer. I STILL get those obnoxious emails that he sends around. I'm just grateful that, after a brief time with him, her death meant I wouldn't have to go over there anymore and face that. It just wasn't worth the battle. And I don't even bother opening those emails at this point.

[handmade34]

4. it will be ok, really

may be difficult but be there for your friend... my oldest daughter married a republican who just keeps getting more republican everyday... I continue to graciously express my views everytime I visit and continue to send my only granddaughter (only 5, but never too young) gifts that speak to the environment and care for each other.

just be there for your friend now and when he finally realizes what has happened or maybe help his new wife see the light... amazing things do happen sometimes. ;-)

[southernyankeebelle]

5. Go and support your friend. Bite your lip and if someone starts tell them you don't want to talk

politics on a day like today and walk away. They can't argue with themselves.

[Rainbowreflect]

6. I will try! Deep breaths and walk away.....

Sounds like a plan.
I think I would go crazy if I could not come here.

[Bluerthanblue]

7. oh geez.... this is where being a friend can be agonizing-

loving and supporting our friends through the hard times. Like parenting. Accepting the fact that others have the right to screw up and that we can't turn off the desire to stop it from happening... Knowing that we can't control others actions and decisions, especially ones we can see clearly are likely to lead to nothing but sorrow- and yet still standing with them- loving them through it.

Sending you wishes for strength, quiet wisdom and peace. True friends- like you are to this person- are so precious.

:grouphug:

[Greyhound]

8. That's all you can do. Stay his friend and be there to help him put his life back together

after she's done wrecking it. At least the kids are grown, so there's some damage she's too late to cause.
:kick: & R

[Rainbowreflect]

11. Very true.

His kids are amazing young people. Both very liberal and involved. His son is going to school and is a very talented musician, and she belittles what he does. And his daughter is also going to college and is so incredibly smart.

[kath]

14. She belittles her fiance's son?!!? To her fiance, or behind his back?

Either way, what a piece of work. Sheesh.

[Rainbowreflect]

15. Both

She does not "approve" of his type of music. If it is not Christian or patriotic music she does not want to hear it.

[Dappleganger]

9. Hope it's open bar.

[Beacool]

10. It's a wedding, just relax and enjoy it.

He won't be the first individual who marries the wrong person. Hopefully, sooner or later he'll realize his mistake.

At the party just eat, drink and be merry. At any rate, a wedding is not the time and place to talk politics and argue.

;)

[Rainbowreflect]

12. You are right.

At least there will be some folk there that I enjoy and don't get to see very often. I will try to just spend my time with them.

[Beacool]

13. I don't stress over politics.

I have my strong beliefs and preferences, and I won't keep my mouth shut if provoked, but I believe in live and let live. I have good friends who I don't talk politics with because they are far more conservative than I am. They are kind and good people, their friendship means more to me than their political affiliation. They are equally as tolerant of my "lefty" views. LOL!!!

:D

[Raster]

16. One of the most demeaning and idiotic socio-memes our American culture perpetuates is the...

..."you are not complete without a partner" meme. I've seen too many people in hideous relationships because of (1) terrified of being along; and/or (2) unable to function as a "stand-alone" unit.

[Rainbowreflect]

18. You are absolutely correct.

My first marriage was awful but I did not want to let go or admit my mistake. It was not until I realized I was much better off alone than with the wrong person and started liking being by myself that I fell in love with my best friend and found out what real love is.
I guess being married to someone who I truly love and who is really my friend and the person I most enjoy being with makes me even more sad when I see someone I care about settling for less.

[mudplanet]

17. As your attorney, I advise you to take two valium and begin drinking heavily

[lunatica]

19. If you show discontent she will make sure to alienate him from you

So just cut politics out of your relationship with your friend if she will know about it.

[Rainbowreflect]

20. Actually that is one of my biggest issues with her.

I can be friends with people who are conservative, I have to I live in a very conservative state, but we respect each other.
When they first started dating I requested she stop sending me hate filled right-wing emails and she just won't stop. She shows me no respect and does not think of anyone but herself.

[Rainbowreflect]

21. Well I made it.

A couple of Black Russians and I can deal with anything. Thanks for the support!

[Raster]

22. Great! Now let's tackle your substance abuse.

Kidding!