from the American Prospect:
Giving Bullies a PassThe "It Gets Better" campaign goes mainstream -- and misses the whole point. Gabriel Arana | November 9, 2010 | web only
The recent spate of gay-teen suicides has triggered a nationwide response -- a national anti-bullying conference including representatives from the Education, Health and Human Services, Agriculture, Interior, and Justice departments; new guidelines from the Department of Education's Office of Civil Rights; and countless submissions to Dan Savage's "It Gets Better" campaign, including videos from straight, high-profile public figures like President Barack Obama.
Indeed, the wave of B-list celebrities and straight liberals making "It Gets Better" videos just keeps growing. But there's a problem: As the discussion about gay-teen suicide has radiated outward, it's stopped being about gay teens. Kim Kardashian has a video relaying how hurt she was at online comments calling her fat. Ezra Klein's video discusses how he was called a nerd in high school. Even Obama's video steers clear of too much talk about gay people, safely focusing on the hurt that comes with "being different or ... not fitting in with everybody else." The public conversation and the policy response have shifted from stopping anti-gay harassment to preventing bullying in general.
As Ann Friedman writes in her column for the Prospect's December issue, by sidestepping the issue, we've squandered a valuable opportunity to talk about what would actually "make things better" for gay people -- both as kids and as adults. That conversation should begin by acknowledging that general "bullying" is different from the sort of prejudice gay kids are up against. It's one thing to be told you're stupid, a dork, or ugly during high school and another to be a permanent member of a stigmatized group.
In this respect, anti-gay harassment is more akin to racial discrimination than the everyday schoolyard taunt. As comedian Margaret Cho says in one of her stand-up acts, "If you call me a slut or a ho, if you tell me I'm ugly, I can argue that; but if you attack me for my race or sexuality, you're attacking who I am." Calling someone a slut is a value judgment, not an attack on who he or she is intrinsically. This is not to say that it's not painful for vulnerable kids to be called names, but it's much easier for a teen to say, "I'm not a slut" than it is to say "I'm not gay" or "I'm not black" if he or she is. And despite the assurance of some commentators that things get better once you have autonomy, anti-gay prejudice doesn't disappear on graduation day. ...........(more)
The complete piece is at:
http://www.prospect.org/cs/articles?article=giving_bullies_a_pass