I don't know why they say grown men don't cry....

[Uben]

Yeah, it's a popular c/w song for those who don't listen to that genre of music. But, it's an old saying as well.

Grown men do cry. Old people cry. Everyone cries!

We don't see it because we are not there when their kid cries himself to sleep because he has a toothache and there isn't money for a dentist. We are not there when a child complains he has to wear soiled or tattered clothes to school. We are not there when suppertime comes around and there is no food for the table. We are not there when he has to explain to his child there is no money for life's necessities. We are not there when he sits down at night with a mountain of medical bills and wonders how any of them will ever get paid.

We cry. You won't see it, but we do. It's what makes us human.

[lunatica]

1. Is this what you're going through right now?

I've had a couple of bad years, though not as bad as so many others. This year I had to file bankruptcy which was discharged (accepted by the court) in September. Now I'm behind on my mortgage payments and I've stated mortgage modification paperwork. I've read a lot of negative things about this. I expect the worst but at least I have a job. It keeps you up nights.

I hope things get better for all of us.

And crying is part of the experience.

[Uben]

2. Actually, no.

But, I have a conscience. I have compassion. My wife is a retired family counselor and we often talk about some of her clients.
It hurts to see people in such dispair. Counselors seldom deal with anything considered good. They are exposed to the side of society that most people don't want to see or hear. Divorce, mental illness, domestic abuse, poverty, you name it. I guess I cry because I know some will die and never actually get to enjoy life. They spend their whole life struggling with something that overwhelms them and as hard as they try, they cannot overcome it.

Just reading the struggles of some here at DU saddens me.

This thread was just a thought I had because I know what's going on behind the scenes of our so called civilized society.

[rustydog]

6. When you see people pick discarded food out of a garbage can and eat it

when you see them barefoor in January. When you see the homeless come out of the bushes as you drive to work inthe morning, When you hand a hungry person a take out meal you bought because you know you can eat later on and the graitude is a tear, it gets to you.

It is frustrating that we cannot help more. A co worker actually forcefully argued this is a lifestyle choice they make.

[WingDinger]

11. Teafreaks will tell you it is just to make the poor beholden, so we can get

enough of the pathetic to vote for us. So we can destroy America. Then, they trot out how they gave a burger to a homeless man once.

[seabeyond]

3. human condition, not gender. i have been fighting this for a while. we like to pretend

and it is only pretend, that men dont feel. they feel. it is the stupidest thing. i wont raise my boys in this stupidness. and it doesnt mean i want men to go around crying, and being emotional all over the place, anymore than i want a woman to be.

but we all have our place to be sad, or afraid, or worried.

[Upton]

4. Not every man cries..

I know I've only cried twice in my adult life. Once in happiness, once over a tragedy. So, I'm sure there are some men who have never cried at all...doesn't make them any less human.

[Uben]

5. I'll take your word for it.

And, I'm glad you haven't had the need for it except for a couple of times. Just know there is nothing wrong with it and it actually helps us to get past some things. I didn't mean to imply not crying was somehow inhuman. I don't think any man or woman is proud of the fact they have tears, it's just a reflex for some.

[elocs]

7. No, it doesn't make them less human, but it doesn't help them to live long

and emotionally healthy lives buying into the popular notion in this country that big boys don't cry, so it's better to hold all those emotions inside.

[elocs]

8. I admit that I cry, shed tears, tear up. And not just over sad things.

I can cry for happy things, seeing or reading about them. I can also cry for noble and self sacrificing things that people do. Anyone crying on tv can get me crying (shedding tears, tearing up), particularly men because they do not so openly cry. It breaks me up when I see an old man begin to cry on camera while relating a story about WWII.

Tears really do cleanse the soul and spirit. I feel sorry for those who seem unable to show even a tear, and even more those who seem proud that they do not.

[Upton]

9. You sound like Dick Vermeil

that's not necessarily a bad thing, but I was brought up to believe holding your emotions inside was a sign of strength. I don't buy into that 100%, particularly since I've fallen off the wagon twice myself, but it is an attribute I admire.

[elocs]

10. We are products of our upbringing, something that is beyond our control.

I was raised by a single mom without any real male influence, so I didn't have the big boys or men don't cry thing pushed on me. Also, being Irish I tend to be sentimental and can feel and show a lot of empathy for people and their situations.

[WingDinger]

12. Grown men are supposed to stifle emotions, till engulfed by rage.

[Romulox]

13. Depression... nt