What some tip a valet to park their car($20) would have fed 10 people on Thanksgiving Day...

[Blackhatjack]

Some of our local shelters were asking for contributions of $2 to feed one person on Thanksgiving Day.

And some of our wealthiest citizens waste 10 times that amount to have their cars parked for them. But they insist on receiving tax cuts they don't need and won't spend. And they refuse to help those unemployed, many homeless, and lots with children.

What is wrong with this picture?

I just don't understand how there could be such a lack of compassion.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

1. It is the best of times. It is the worst of times

Something like that ..........

[Drale]

2. We can never understand

I don't know about you guys but when I see someone suffering it hurts me, but they feel no such pain. In fact I suspect that more then a few of them would laugh at another's pain. That is one of the big differences between us and them.

[Angry Dragon]

3. I believe a lot of people on DU would call these people

http://www.mcafee.cc/Bin/sb.html


Profile of the Sociopath

This website summarizes some of the common features of descriptions of the behavior of sociopaths.


* Glibness and Superficial Charm

* Manipulative and Conning
They never recognize the rights of others and see their self-serving behaviors as permissible. They appear to be charming, yet are covertly hostile and domineering, seeing their victim as merely an instrument to be used. They may dominate and humiliate their victims.

* Grandiose Sense of Self
Feels entitled to certain things as "their right."

* Pathological Lying
Has no problem lying coolly and easily and it is almost impossible for them to be truthful on a consistent basis. Can create, and get caught up in, a complex belief about their own powers and abilities. Extremely convincing and even able to pass lie detector tests.

* Lack of Remorse, Shame or Guilt
A deep seated rage, which is split off and repressed, is at their core. Does not see others around them as people, but only as targets and opportunities. Instead of friends, they have victims and accomplices who end up as victims. The end always justifies the means and they let nothing stand in their way.

* Shallow Emotions
When they show what seems to be warmth, joy, love and compassion it is more feigned than experienced and serves an ulterior motive. Outraged by insignificant matters, yet remaining unmoved and cold by what would upset a normal person. Since they are not genuine, neither are their promises.

* Incapacity for Love

* Need for Stimulation
Living on the edge. Verbal outbursts and physical punishments are normal. Promiscuity and gambling are common.

* Callousness/Lack of Empathy
Unable to empathize with the pain of their victims, having only contempt for others' feelings of distress and readily taking advantage of them.

* Poor Behavioral Controls/Impulsive Nature
Rage and abuse, alternating with small expressions of love and approval produce an addictive cycle for abuser and abused, as well as creating hopelessness in the victim. Believe they are all-powerful, all-knowing, entitled to every wish, no sense of personal boundaries, no concern for their impact on others.

* Early Behavior Problems/Juvenile Delinquency
Usually has a history of behavioral and academic difficulties, yet "gets by" by conning others. Problems in making and keeping friends; aberrant behaviors such as cruelty to people or animals, stealing, etc.

* Irresponsibility/Unreliability
Not concerned about wrecking others' lives and dreams. Oblivious or indifferent to the devastation they cause. Does not accept blame themselves, but blames others, even for acts they obviously committed.

* Promiscuous Sexual Behavior/Infidelity
Promiscuity, child sexual abuse, rape and sexual acting out of all sorts.

* Lack of Realistic Life Plan/Parasitic Lifestyle
Tends to move around a lot or makes all encompassing promises for the future, poor work ethic but exploits others effectively.

* Criminal or Entrepreneurial Versatility
Changes their image as needed to avoid prosecution. Changes life story readily.

[sweetapogee]

17. about

10 years ago my niece by hit by a car in upstate NY. She spent 3 weeks in intensive care then was transferred to Shriner's in Phili. where she spent 3 months. Three surgeries, doctor flown in each time from Germany. No cost, no bills to my brother and his wife. In the lobby of the hospital there are plaque's representing individual million dollar donations, some are 5 and even 10 million. My point, some people that have money do good with it.

[wtmusic]

4. Waste? Valets aren't exactly top wage-earners either. nt

[GKirk]

6. That was pretty much

what I thought when I read the original post. It kept a couple of valets out of the unemployment line for a little bit.

[GKirk]

7. That was pretty much

what I thought when I read the original post. It kept a couple of valets out of the unemployment line for a little bit.

[GKirk]

9. That was pretty much

what I thought when I read the original post. It kept a couple of valets out of the unemployment line for a little bit.

[Raine]

33. I agree, I'm sure the valet can use the money

and is very glad to get it.

[flvegan]

5. Some of our non-wealthiest "waste" that much on going to the movies.

I see the point you're making, it just doesn't resonate well with me. 20 bucks is 20 bucks. An individual making $200k/year isn't remotely close to "our wealthiest citizens" but are rather just doing a bit better than most of us (depending on where they live).

That said, I agree that it is a shame that more folks with means aren't more charitable. I know a good number are, but a good number aren't.

[Hannah Bell]

11. people making $200K a year aren't "just doing a bit better than most of us".

they're the top 5%.

median personal income in 2005 for workers (excluding people on social programs) was about $28K.

so an individual making $200K is doing SEVEN TIMES BETTER or more than every individual from the middle on down.

they're not "our wealthiest," but they're the top of the upper middle class or the bottom of the "wealthiest".

[flvegan]

12. ...and you skim over the "depending on where they live" as usual.

Not that I'm terribly shocked, considering.

[JVS]

18. $200k is doing fine anywhere.

[flvegan]

22. Define "doing fine" please.

Be articulate.

[Hannah Bell]

23. it doesn't matter a damn where they live. as has been noted before when the same thing came up.

median income for men in new york city = $37K. that means half the men in nyc make less.

http://cbs4.com/health/cholera.south.florida.2.2025027.html

so if you're an individual making $200K in one of the most expensive cities in the country, you're *still* doing better than the majority of the people living there.

people who say $200k isn't much in *their* neck of the woods are comparing themselves to the rockefellers, not to the ordinary joe.

yeah, it's "not much" if you're aspiring to live like a rockefeller. but it's still top tier, even in new york city.

[flvegan]

24. Did you miss where I said "doing better"?

I never said that $200k "isn't much" no matter how you spin it.

You should do better than this if you want to be effective.

[Hannah Bell]

26. "just doing a bit better" just a bit, just a little bit...depending on where they live....

no, they're doing a *lot* better than 95% of us, & it doesn't matter where they live.

it's my pov that anyone who works for a living belongs to the working class, but it gags me when people at the top of the payscale pretend they're "jes folk" barely getting by because they live in an expensive city.

[flvegan]

30. Your pov blinds you.

Makes your point inadequate. Sorry, Hannah.

[Hannah Bell]

36. lol.

[BoneDaddy]

38. She is blinded by her pov

in most of her arguments.

[Hannah Bell]

41. lol. attack the person when you can't dispute the facts.

1/2 the workforce makes less than $38K a year. 2/3 make less than $60K.

[BoneDaddy]

47. in your world there exists ONLY black and white

you are childish and see only what you want to see regardless of how well thought out the argument is.

[bluedigger]

8. As long as they are spending their money in the local economy I won't criticize.

How much do some spend on their hair and nails? What difference does it make? Spending of disposable income is good.

[kestrel91316]

20. I am a big fan of parting the wealthy from as much money as possible

as quickly as possible. And I prefer it go into the pockets of individuals and small local businesses.

[liberal N proud]

10. Not to take away from your valid point here but if I were to tip a valet

for parking my car, it would be commensurate to what the value of my vehicle and contents are. Many valets are working for minimum wages and are put in charge of some very expensive property. The tip is a reward for care provided by the valet.

That said: Generosity should be first in everyones life. We must care for the least among us.

[undeterred]

13. Maybe the valet has 10 people to feed.

I got a $100 tip for catering for some rich people on Christmas Eve, and believe me I appreciated it.

[stray cat]

14. And provides a living wage and job to those who park the cars

[Wheezy]

15. and sometimes

people who are wealthy are more than willing to pay their taxes and do not want the Bush tax cut extended, and they tip the valet $20 so he can go home and tell his wife he had a good day, and they send $100 to the local shelter to provide 50 Thanksgiving meals, and they send $40,000 to other charitable organizations that really help people over the course of a year, and they make 150 peanut butter sandwiches for the homeless once a month so they can eat lunch while looking for jobs, and...and...and...

I hear what you are saying, and you're right, some wealthy people are like that. But often the broad brush gets painted here -- that wealth equals bad, selfish, republican. There are many wealthy people who give a lot -- they just don't always talk about it. So many actors, entertainers, authors... wealthy, liberal, generous, and compassionate. But we don't seem to give them a lot of credit around here.

[LAGC]

25. If only we all had that much disposable income...

To be able to afford such acts of charity!

We don't we ever question HOW and WHY these people accumulated such mass wealth in the first place?

Yet, its all okay because they give a tiny fraction of it to charity?

[Wheezy]

39. I think we are talking about different people.

$40k is a "tiny fraction" to some. But others in this thread are talking about people who make $200k. And pay their full taxes on that amount. And still manage to give away $40k a year.

And what is "all okay?" I don't know what you mean. HOW and WHY? I mentioned entertainers, actors, writers, most of whom worked their asses off to get where they are now and had some good luck along the way, and probably have seen poverty in one form or another at some point in their lives, so they give liberally whenever they have the chance -- be it valet, taxi, restaurant server, house cleaner, or whatever. These wealthy people are democrats, and I'm sick of everybody hating on them too when these liberal entertainers are some of the people who draw attention to our causes -- Ashton Kutcher and his mosquito nets in Africa. George Clooney and all he's done for Haiti, etc. The broad brush of "wealthy equals evil" also paints over those who do a ton for liberal causes. That doesn't seem fair at all.

When I was poor, I still gave 10% of all my income to charity, even when I didn't know where my next meal would come from. At least I had a place to rest. I"m not poor anymore, and I give a much higher percentage of money and my time to important causes. People who constantly rag on the wealthy here, equating them to extreme right wingers, are alienating those who are most generous in helping those in need. It just gets old sometimes. I'm not trying to rag on anybody in particular. I just heard it once too often here. Major broad brush stuff gets old.

[LAGC]

44. I just question how people can become so rich.

Even actors and liberal entertainers, folks like Keith Olbermann. I mean, do you really need a multi-million salary when the vast majority of people are making under $50K a year? $200K isn't so outlandish considering how much it costs to live in some areas, but the folks raking in the 7+ figures, I just don't understand how they can live with themselves, knowing that their wealth comes from so many people "below" them that have so much less. So they give a small amount to charity to make it seem better. Wouldn't it be better if there was no poverty and no one needed charity in the first place? Just seems like we could do more to lift the "small" people up than to elevate a few rich people on such pedestals.

I mean, rich people don't become rich without exploiting many people working under them or sapping money from a wide swath of working stiffs through over-priced products/services. I mean, you mention actors, is there really any good reason it should cost $10+ for a fucking movie ticket? I know the studios rake in a lot of that, and that should change, but let's be reasonable here. Why do actors deserve to make MILLIONS? Or authors with their over-priced books? Or anyone for that matter?

[Ikonoklast]

16. And that twenty bucks might keep that valet out of a soup line.

Also, how is it you know that the person doing the tipping didn't give a nice donation to the local food bank?

Broad brushes paint lousy pictures.

[kestrel91316]

19. Or that same $10 will feed the 5 people at the valet's table for 2 nights.

I see no difference.

[Bluebear]

28. +

[pnwmom]

21. I would think a generous tip to a valet would be a good thing,

if you're going to use one.

[petronius]

27. Truly. I'd be far more disapproving of the person who fails to tip or under-tips the valet

People working for tips are pretty far down the totem pole, so paying them well is a good thing...

[tblue37]

29. I am glad the parking valet got $20. He probably needed it. nt

[dkf]

31. $20 for a valet?

Is that for parking or a tip?

[Raine]

32. Valets aren't rich though and are likely to spend

the money on a variety of things that in the end helps the economy and other wage earners.

[Obamanaut]

34. Is it in the realm of possibility that the tipper did in fact contribute a large

amount to a food shelter? We don't know that he did not, do we.

Is it also possible that the tipper gave the valet $20 because of his generous nature, wanting to "give back" (as so many like to say), and the valet was the handy recipient for that generosity? We don't know.

Isn't just as easy to think positive thoughts about the tipper, rather than negative?

[Dr. Strange]

35. Tickets for the Roger Waters concert falls in the $50 - 1000 range.

How many poor people do you think that will feed?

:popcorn:

[LanternWaste]

37. And I wasted $20.00 on two DVDs this weekend...

And I wasted $20.00 on two unnecessary DVDs this weekend...

I just don't understand how I could lack such compassion... unless of course I do in fact put a portion of my money towards particular charities, but then that would mean we'd have to allow for those "rich cats" paying for Valet parking the same square deal.

[cherokeeprogressive]

40. Seems Blackhatjack never came back. n/t

[Blackhatjack]

42. Simply Amazing!.... count the replies addressing the families in need of $2 meals ....

as opposed to the number of replies that focused on defending those who are capable of making donations but instead "spend their disposable income" on other things.

'Some of our wealthiest citizens' is not an indictment of all people of wealth, and same was never insinuated in the OP as some later posters tried to allege. But I guess you have to make up a defense if you don't already have one.

BTW every purchase we make carries with it an ethical obligation ... and that includes so-called 'disposable income.' And just because you spend all of your disposable income does not in and of itself make you an admirable person.

[Chorophyll]

43. I don't think anyone is purposefully ignoring

the fact that $20 can feed a lot of people, and that some people can drop twenty bucks pretty easily without a second thought.

But the way you framed your case, it's hard to not automatically think of that valet, who (at least in my neck of the woods) is probably one of the "working poor," and not too far from a meal in a shelter himself. Maybe you should have used a different example for comparison.

[Hello_Kitty]

45. If I had an extra $40 I'd tip the valet and give to the shelter. eom

[Warren DeMontague]

46. By all means, my wealthy friends- the place to cut back is your excessive TIPPING.

See, austerity isn't so hard!

Who knew, the karmic benefits you could gain: not by losing the $400 sweater for Fifi the poodle, but by stiffing the staff.:think: