A true story about racial sensitivity

[Empowerer]

Years ago, while I was teaching a law seminar, I mentioned in passing that someone had gotten "gypped" in a transaction. After class, one of my students approached me and asked me if I knew that "gyp" is a racist term - it referred to gypsies - and told me that my comment had offended her deeply.

Until then, I had absolutely no idea that this term referred to gypsies or that it was considered a vicious slur and was mortified that I had been using it so casually for so long. I apologized to her and thanked her for letting me know this. I truly appreciated her telling me this - she not only educated me, she did me a real favor. And I know it took courage for a student to challenge her professor in this way.

I think one of the problems with these discussions is that they usually immediately diverted by shifting the focus away from the problem with the expression to an accusation that those who are offended by that expression are ipso facto attacking the originator. Nothing shuts down a discussion prompted by, "Your comment was offensive" faster than the old standby "how DARE you call me/him/her a racist!" followed by a dissertation of all of the nice, non-racist things the person has done or said in their lives, as if that completely eliminates the offensiveness of their expression. Then, of course, we must endure the accusations that the person who expressed offense is the TRUE racist, an overly-sensitive troublemaker who is wreaking havoc on innocent people and making racism in America so much worse than it already is.

When someone says they find a comment or attitude offensive, that is NOT the same as calling the person engaging in it a racist. I would think that an open-minded person would actually appreciate having such things brought to their attention, whether it's something they said or a comment by someone else, if only to learn a little more about getting along with their neighbors.

I'm really having trouble understanding how true liberals would find introspection and growth to be so difficult - and are so eager to attack anyone and anything that suggests that they are not pure as the driven snow in all things racial.

Being liberal/progressive is no more tantamount to being perfect than being insensitive or biased is tantamount to being racist.

[Cali_Democrat]

1. Is this post about the Melissa Harris-Perry kerfuffle?

[JustAnotherGen]

2. Quite true!

When someone says they find a comment or attitude offensive, that is NOT the same as calling the person engaging in it a racist. I would think that an open-minded person would actually appreciate having such things brought to their attention, whether it's something they said or a comment by someone else, if only to learn a little more about getting along with their neighbors.

[boston bean]

3. People don't appreciate having their motives questioned. That is the difference here.

Your motives were not questioned. If that person went on to tell you that she knew you must have some bias against gypsies because if you didn't you would have never said it, and continued to accuse you about your alleged/and accused you falsely about biases, you might have become offended. See the difference there. Can you learn anything from it.

[Empowerer]

4. I doubt I would have been offended by that, given what I had said

I would think that it was a logical, even if incorrect, conclusion for someone to make. Even if I didn't like having my motives questioned, I wouldn't have assumed that the person so doing was completely off base, overly sensitive or themselves had some unsavory motive for doing so.

And if I had continued to say it, even after being told that it was offensive, I certainly wouldn't have been surprised if someone drew an inference about my attitudes and motives.

[boston bean]

5. And they went on to continue seeing you in that light, would be AOK.

You actually said something that was racially insensitive, and you moved on and never did it again. You shouldn't, because it is racist.

Joan on the other hand called someone a professional friend. The meaning of Melissa's words are plain for everyone to see. She left no room. She basically said Walsh wasn't her friend and that Joan was employing a racially charged argument, by calling her a professional friend, to show she wasn't racially biased or racist.

Big freakin difference there. Start to really read the words and determine why someone might take offense. You really should take your own advice. Put yourself in the shoes of another and try to understand why someone might take offense.

I'll do the same. Today on DU someone called Obama a house...... I was mortified. That is real racism. I hope the member is banned. I spoke out about it.

[Supersedeas]

18. Well put...there is a point of distinction to be made

Put another way, if during the law seminar the term "gypsie" was never used, but at the end of the seminar, the student approached the professor to ask whether the discussion of the line between good faith and bad faith business dealings was directed at 'gypsies.' When the professor attempts to deny that the lecture had anything whatsoever to do with gypsies, the student further insists that his 'denial' is further evidence that he knows nothing about the gypsie experience and that maybe his prejudices prevents him from understanding how the lecture could be offensive to many in his class. Meanwhile, the substance of the lecture and the importance of good and bad faith business dealing gets lost in the endless discussion about motives.

When those who are interested in clarifying the line between progressives and centrists are dismissed as merely racists, there may be a similar loss as well. A lesson deferred, but deferred with political intent.

[Whisp]

6. k&r

[lumberjack_jeff]

7. Which comment and/or attitude prevalent at DU do you find offensive?

If it's the observation that the President is doing a lackluster job, I fear you'll remain offended.

Introspection doesn't mean accepting uncritically what others think about your motivations.

[lunatica]

8. You have empowered me with new knowledge

I learned what gypped means and I will never use that word again. But not because I was trying to offend with it before. I was ignorant of its etymology and so I was innocent of using it as a slur. But now I don't have the excuse of ignorance.

Thanks! I love learning new stuff!

[vaberella]

9. Just know what you say. I hate using the word "picnic," but that's just me. n/t

[roguevalley]

10. I loked that up baberella

here is a quote from the end of the article (Pics there are horrendous if you go to the link)

9 The word picnic did not begin with the lynching of black Americans; however, the lynching of blacks often occurred in picnic-like settings.

Dr. David Pilgrim
Curator, Jim Crow Museum
January 2004

http://www.ferris.edu/jimcrow/question/jan04.htm

[demmiblue]

11. I find it strange that at the professorial level you didn't know that "gyp" was a slur.

I am not accusing you of being ignorant, but I find it interesting that you never heard of this slight before your experience with this student.

This is one of the reasons why I appreciate the fact that most college degrees now require credits in cultural studies. It can only benefit us all.

[Empowerer]

13. I was ignorant about that particular slur

Even though I'm extremely knowledgeable about these kinds of things, this was something that had escaped me. Probably because I didn't say it that often and, likely when I did either no one I was with knew it was a slur or didn't speak up until then. But you don't know what you don't know until you know it, so I'm always glad when people point these kinds of things out. I certainly don't take offense or believe that I'm being called a racist.

Now, if I kept saying it AFTER I was told what it meant, claiming that I'M not a racist and I'm not using the word in a racist way, so why should I get jumped on for using a word ... and attacked people who DID take offense for being overly-sensitive ...

[demmiblue]

14. Ok.

I see your point in your first paragraph, although I would question the extremely knowledgeable part... seems like common knowledge to me. I am sure I have made similar misunderstandings (as do many people). Learning from one's mistakes is a good thing!

Your second paragraph is very hard to understand.

[EffieBlack]

16. The point of my second paragraph was this . . .

I was using a term that some people find deeply offensive. I wasn't using the term in any racist way (i.e., I wasn't trying to slur any group or individual) - I didn't even know it referred to gypsies. When i was told that this was the case, I stopped doing it immediately.

Unfortunately, some people, when told that something they say is offensive to others, get very angry and defensive, feeling that they are being accused of being bigots or racists, even when they're not. They question why they should be called out on their offensive language since they didn't mean it to be offensive. They seem to believe that trying not to say things that offend other people is an unfair burden on them - and that those who are offended are somehow picking on them when, instead, they should just be less sensitive.

[Enrique]

12. it's a matter of trust

you obviously trusted that that student was speaking from the heart.

For me, I don't have a total level of trust when it comes to race when it's mixed with partisan politics. I listen, but I ask myself is this about race or is it about a certain politician?

[EffieBlack]

15. So you try to infer the motivations of the person rather than take what they're saying at face value

but resent it if someone does the same to you?

In this instance, it really didn't matter to me what their motivation was. The fact was the fact - the term "gyp" is offensive to some people, regardless how I meant it. That was enough for me.

[fishwax]

17. Thanks for sharing that story, Empowerer -- k/r

:kick: