http://thedesperateblogger.com/2011/05/breaking-trump-calls-on-obama-to-produce-bin-ladens-long-form-death-certificate/Speaking at a hastily called press conference outside the hotel suite where he was conducting contestant interviews for a new reality TV series tentatively titled, ‘Female Apprentice: The Next Mrs. Trump’, surprise 2012 GOP presidential front-runner Donald Trump expressed his skepticism regarding President Obama’s announcement that US forces have killed Osama bin Laden in Pakistan.
“While I hope it is true – and I’m not questioning Obama’s honesty – I see no reason why he would hesitate putting the whole issue to rest by simply releasing the long form version of the death certificate,” Trump, still brooding over what he earlier described as ‘the vicious, not funny attacks’ he ‘was forced to endure’ at Saturday’s White House Correspondents Dinner told the handful of gathered reporters. “That being said, if it is true then I am so very proud of myself for having been able to play such an important role in such an important international development. Let’s be honest with ourselves – as events of the past week clearly demonstrate, if I wasn’t leading in the polls, this administration would never have gotten off their asses and finally done what should have been done years ago. So while I would still like to see a legitimate death certificate, let me repeat that this – if what is being reported is true – is a great evening for the United States and I could not be more proud to have played such a crucial role in bringing it about.”
Trump, who has yet to declare his candidacy for 2012, but who has indicated that he would not be interested in serving as another president’s Secretary of State, also took the opportunity while reporters were present, to clarify and elaborate upon his recent comment where he described himself as having a great relationship with “The Blacks”:
“When I referred to the Blacks, I didn’t mean to imply that they’re the only minority that I’m concerned about and that I believe it’s important we have a good relationship with. I’ve always also had nothing but good relationships with the Latins, the Arabs, and the Orientals. And we also can’t forget other groups who have often been the target of discrimination, but who I’ve always given a fair deal even when I could’ve probably screwed them, like the Homos and the Cripples. So I hope this will finally put all of that concocted controversy over my comment about the Blacks to rest. Hopefully, we can now finally discuss important issues, like corporate taxes and the minimum wage.”
House Speaker John Boehner released a statement congratulating and thanking members of the US Armed Forces and intelligence community as well as praising the President’s handling of the raid that reportedly brought down the FBI’s Most Wanted Terrorist. The communique, released by The Bronze Clod’s office shortly after midnight Eastern time read in part, “Let’s not forget the hard work, courage and sacrifice of our valiant troops and intelligence operatives that will remain ongoing, and also, in this moment of great national pride, I would like to personally congratulate the President. I recognize how sensitive and difficult it must have been for him to unilaterally authorize a military action in within the borders sovereign country — especially one that he had to assume would take the life of a fellow Muslim.”
May 2nd, 2011 | Tags: birther, Donald Trump, GOP Election 2012, Obama birth certificate, Osama bin Laden | Category: Homeland Security, Politics, Satire, World News