SATIRE from
http://thedesperateblogger.com/wp-admin/post.php?action=edit&post=1509&message=6Under the most bizarre of circumstances, Sarah Palin announced this morning that she has decided to endorse Texas Governor Rick Perry for President in the 2012 elections.
In a moment described by a staffer as, “just one of those little tricks the mind plays on people sometimes,” the former half-term Alaska Governor, upon seeing the crowd gathered outside her ‘One Nation’ tour bus at an Indianola, Iowa shopping mall – and also apparently forgetting what day it was -- believed she was at tomorrow’s Tea Party of America rally, and began reading the prepared remarks which had already been neatly printed on her hands.
“Rick Perry is not only a man of principle whose values are right for America, but he’s also the shrewdest politician I’ve ever been able to keep up with,” she told the startled but delighted throng, “and for those and many other reasons, I am today announcing my support for him -- not only for President of the United States, but also for President of the Republic of Texas. The wisdom, the courage, and the leadership skills he possesses make him perhaps the only candidate out there who is capable of reuniting Texas and the United States, and putting 'legals' back to work.”
Fielding questions from the one journalist who just happened to be present for her unexpected bombshell announcement, Skippy Ludwick of the
Indianola Central High Clarion, the more-disoriented-than-usual prospective GOP candidate stated unequivocally that her endorsement of Perry should in no way be interpreted as an indication that she has decided not to run.
“I’m keeping my options open – it’s every woman’s prerogative to change her mind. In the meantime, I can still legally collect speaking fees while I’m ‘sorta’ campaigning,” she told the evenly-matched sophomore cub reporter, further explaining, “If I’m going to take such a big hit in earnings in order to serve the greatest country in the four-or-so thousand year history of the universe, I need to make as much as I can before I announce. I have a family to think about. And let me tell ya’, the girls and my taste in clothes has totally outgrown good ‘ol Todd’s salary, God bless him.”
When pressed for an explanation as to how the Wasilla Wizard could possibly have mistaken a group of parking lot gawkers for tomorrow’s scheduled rally, Newton Toomey, a senior aide who spoke on condition of anonymity responded, “It’s actually quite understandable. She saw a crowd in mall parking lot with hastily written, misspelled signs and a very low
per capita number of teeth. Anybody might have thought it was a Tea Party rally.”
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