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Was there ever anti-LGBT violence at the schools you attended?

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bluestateguy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-25-11 10:56 PM
Original message
Was there ever anti-LGBT violence at the schools you attended?
Edited on Sun Sep-25-11 11:06 PM by bluestateguy
Or how about at the schools your children attend(ed)?

And yes, I count bullying as violence.

on edit: I forgot to add the word "violence"
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sakabatou Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-25-11 10:58 PM
Response to Original message
1. Not to my knowledge
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izquierdista Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-25-11 11:01 PM
Response to Original message
2. There wasn't any 'LGBT' when I went to school
I believe it was after Stonewall that the word 'gay' came into the vernacular. Certainly before 1969, gay was apparel that was sung about in Christmas carols.
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bigwillq Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-25-11 11:01 PM
Response to Original message
3. Here
Edited on Sun Sep-25-11 11:02 PM by bigwillq
Not my school, but a private school in the state that I live.

http://www.courant.com/news/breaking/hc-campbell-rachel-0907-20110907,0,4902441.column

Is this what you mean by anti-LGBT?
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iris27 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-25-11 11:03 PM
Response to Original message
4. I went to a parochial Lutheran high school. "Anti-LGBT" was part of the curriculum.
My best friend was gay; it was NOT easy on him. At least there were a few of us he could lean on without judgement.
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Chipper Chat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-25-11 11:16 PM
Response to Original message
5. No.
One guy in my high school choir was 'out and queer' and had a boyfriend. No one cared and I do not remember anybody bullying him or even making a joke. He was just accepted. Another boy who was the student manager of the basketball team was also 'known.' But he was a star baseball player as well and provided a 'special service' for the other team members (I'll just leave it at that). All this was during the 50s well before Anita Bryant. Everyone just accepted gayness - not the bigotry we have in today's environment.
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LeftyMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-25-11 11:21 PM
Response to Original message
6. Definitely not. Quite a few people were out, teachers and students both.
One of the students at my school was trans, and I never heard of her running into any real difficulties, except that she took zero period PE and changed in the staff bathroom or something to avoid that being an issue.

I'm 30 now, so this was a while ago.
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SwampG8r Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-25-11 11:25 PM
Response to Original message
7. yes
i had a dear friend who was a year younger than me
we grew up next door he was a nice kid
he was very effeminate and would from time to time get on some rednecks radar
a bunch of us from the same neighborhood did what we could to keep people from fucking with him
especially the girls if you messed with him none of those girls would ever so much as look at you
to this day i do not know if he was gay or not as we lost touch when he went to college
so yes there is violence every day somewhere for some poor kid because of who he is
or isnt i suppose
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emilyg Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-25-11 11:27 PM
Response to Original message
8. No.
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Behind the Aegis Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-25-11 11:38 PM
Response to Original message
9. Fuck yes! All three of the HS I attended!
Southern GA (freshman year): Attacked in the locker room; shouted at in the hallways, almost daily; notes in and on my locker
Pittsburgh (sophomore year): Comments in classrooms; note left on the blackboard (that the teacher didn't remove until he needed the space to write); snide remarks from a teacher about "homos" then a head-cock toward me, or a "pat on the back"
NO. VA (junior and senior years): attacked in hallway, bathrooms, and lower levels of school (once i the parking lot and once in the dining hall); phone calls to my house; death threats; notes on and in my locker; stalking
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Shagbark Hickory Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 11:11 AM
Response to Reply #9
29. sd
Edited on Mon Sep-26-11 11:13 AM by Shagbark Hickory
wrong place
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donheld Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 12:23 AM
Response to Original message
10. Daily
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Fearless Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 12:38 AM
Response to Original message
11. Bullying yes... violence... probably.
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Luminous Animal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 12:41 AM
Response to Original message
12. Yes.
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Initech Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 12:44 AM
Response to Original message
13. If there was when I was in school I was totally oblivious to it.
Of course now that I'm older and much wiser that this sort of thing happens, I'm sure it was. I was the victim of a lot of high school bullying, and while at the time, I wasn't aware of the anti-GLBT commentary of it, I'm sure that those types of things were shouted at me during at least the first two years. And then my mom taught at the school a few years after I graduated, and found out that the supers - who did nothing when I was there, still do nothing to this day.
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TexasProgresive Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 05:17 AM
Response to Original message
14. If there were any gays in my high school they keep it in a dark closet
I am straight but one of my best friends is gay-I didn't know and he tried not to be. Fortunately he is free to be himself now.

What I do remember is that certain guys would brag about going to where gays frequented and "rolling" queers. They knew that those men had no recourse since the police would just give them another beating. It was a bad time.
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cordelia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 05:23 AM
Response to Original message
15. No.
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Brickbat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 06:56 AM
Response to Original message
16. Not that I know of, but there was certainly bullying of people who were perceived as gay. No one
Edited on Mon Sep-26-11 06:57 AM by Brickbat
was out AFAIK, except for two teachers. Both were male English teachers. One was very effeminate, the other was a total bear. Both were mocked behind their backs, but in the way that all teachers were; their homosexuality was what we keyed on, while it was looks or speaking voice for other teachers. In class, though, both were generally well-liked.

The girls' gym teacher was rumored to be a lesbian and she was not liked at all.

This was at a large public school in the late 80s.
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NNN0LHI Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 07:03 AM
Response to Original message
17. The majority of bullying when I went through grade school was directed toward ...
Edited on Mon Sep-26-11 07:05 AM by NNN0LHI
... kids who didn't wear the coolest clothes or had patches on them because their parents couldn't afford anything better.

True story.

Don
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Zephie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 07:18 AM
Response to Original message
18. I only went to an actual school for two years, but I went to a performing arts school
Doesn't really lend itself to LGBTQI hatred, thankfully.
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HughBeaumont Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 07:29 AM
Response to Original message
19. In my redneck shithole of a high school (Vermilion Ohio, and I'll always mention it) . . . .
. . . it was pretty much open season on anyone who didn't look like a JCPenney mannequin.

Band kids got fucked with the most. As did the learning disabled. So did non-popular smart kids. Fat beta kids had bullseyes on their back. Acne. Brown patches. Skinny. Non-athletic. Bad hair. Socially awkward. Not as attractive. Has no interest in fighting. From the wrong family. Listened to the wrong music. Helped the cafeteria workers. Open season.

Oh, and that whole thing about marijuana being "the great equalizer" . . . like in Breakfast Club, where kids from all walks smoke a doob and everything's Jim Dandy? Bullshit. An asshole who smokes weed doesn't become mellow or accommodating . . . he's still an asshole. Some of the larger burnouts bullied the kids listed above right along with the athletes and cheerbitches. Although I really gotta thank them . . . it's because of people like that I never touched drugs of any kind.

Oh, and if you were gay, you were in a locked-from-both-sides closet or you risked your life. And I'm not even kidding on that one.

Athletes weren't just bullies, they were serial victimizers.

I went to church with many, many victimizing idiots.

Most of my bullies were children of teachers, which is why nothing at all was done about it.

Coaches did absolutely nothing about bullying. Some coaches were bullies themselves and threatened kids with violence (myself included).

Teachers . . . same thing. They berated and humiliated weaker kids in class, often.

Nobody stood up for anyone. It was every person for themselves. Adults failed to protect any of us. My grades suffered tremendously because I couldn't concentrate and was only thinking about 3:00 PM. My relationship with my family was massively strained because they, like many others (including some on this board) blamed ME for it all. My sister never saw where I was coming from because she was friends with all of them.

"It gets better?" No, it fucking doesn't. It NEVER goes away. It was the most miserable experience of my life and might as well have been an eternity as long as it lasted.

I carry hatred for these fuckers every single day, to this day. I can't go back to that city without my senses going haywire. I can't look at a former asshole without wanting to hospitalize him. I have a grave hatred and intolerance for drunks and assholes. I won't step into a bar because I see these very types of people. They all look the same and if you talked to them, they act the same as well.

Every day one of my former tormentors walk around not giving me or anyone else one "sorry" or feel one ounce of remorse or pay even the slightest bit physically, I feel there's something terribly wrong with that.

Adults (particularly administrators) and police need to get their hands dirty and stop this. There's no two ways about it. Bullying is assault. Assault is a crime, a crime that's being committed by and large BY CHOICE. These aren't kids with mental or behavioral issues, they're normal kids who are choosing to be an asshole and commit a CRIME.

It's just a massive disgrace that there are people on a progressive board failing to see that.
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Jkid Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 08:04 AM
Response to Reply #19
24. Thank you for proving that "It's Get Better" is nothing more than feel good bullshit.
Because the effects of peer abuse and harassment and bullying does not end when it actually ends. It stays with you long after the actual incidents. And people who tell you to let it go, they just don't get it or haven't even experienced harassment in a personal scale. You're right, I don't care if these bullying thugs are socially privileged because they're children of teachers, or in a sports team, jail them or least feature them in a scared straight program.
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bluestateguy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 11:38 AM
Response to Reply #19
34. Indeed
But I also think that self-defense should be promoted too. I know it is not feasible or realistic for everyone, and schools need to take these things seriously, but some of these school bullies could stand a good ass kicking now and then.
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Pab Sungenis Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 07:31 AM
Response to Original message
20. Every school I ever attended.
Even college. When I was in college in the late 80's a gay kid was thrown through a plate glass window at the local gay bar by someone who went there specifically to "beat up a fag."

We've come a ways in the last 20 years, but not nearly far enough.
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Marrah_G Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 07:50 AM
Response to Original message
21. Yes, there was bullying at my school
I am sure there is less at my son's school though. They have many gay friends, the gay straight alliance is really big and our mayor is gay. Around here I don't think much is made of it once they get to HS. I could see middle schoolers using the F word and getting sent to the principal for a talk. I'm fortunate to live in a pretty diverse place.

My son is not gay, but is and was the target of bullying all his life. He is a senior now and has made a couple new friends this year that seem to have his back. He is socially akward and behind, sort of like aspbergers but not. He makes an easy target.
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MineralMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 07:57 AM
Response to Original message
22. High school was 59-63 for me.
Edited on Mon Sep-26-11 08:01 AM by MineralMan
No anti-GLBT violence there, since nobody was out at the time. There was one kid who committed suicide, though. I didn't know him, so I don't know the reasons for it. He was a Freshman the year I graduated. Very little was ever said about it. It was a very small school in a small CA town. There was some general bullying, but there was an informal anti-bullying program set up by some church kids and supported by the athletic coaches, who had strict rules for team members about engaging in or tolerating bullying. It was a pretty peaceful school, most of the time.
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Iggo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 08:01 AM
Response to Original message
23. That was the ONLY voice when I went to school. (n/t)
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dipsydoodle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 08:09 AM
Response to Original message
25. No
.
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itsallhappening Donating Member (578 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 08:11 AM
Response to Original message
26. Violence? No. Teasing? Maybe.
But people got teased for all kinds of things. It's part of being a kid.

I think there was only one guy we all knew was gay anyway.
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hunter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 10:44 AM
Response to Original message
27. I was a weird skinny kid.
From middle school on bullies called me "queer bait" and worse. I was made to feel it was my fault whenever I got battered; that I'd made myself a target.

Nothing much ever happened to those who bullied me. Maybe they'd have to pick up trash during lunch, but that was it. "Boys will be boys." No calling parents, no suspensions, no expulsions, no mandatory counseling...

Quitting high school was one of the smartest things I ever did. I'd have happily skipped middle school too.

In a better world places like my middle school and high school wouldn't exist.
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closeupready Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 10:56 AM
Response to Original message
28. Not that I recall; there were verbal taunts, though, Yours Truly being at the receiving end
on several occasions. Which led to a brief period of weight-lifting as a defense (which worked, coincidentally, lol).
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Shagbark Hickory Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 11:14 AM
Response to Original message
30. The only real bully I remember was in elementary school and he grew up to be a bully in college too.
Can you imagine the look on my face when I show up to college, freshman year, to find my grade school arch nemesis who I hadn't seen since the 5th grade. He carried right but with stalking and some really creepy shit. Still banding together a small gang to be bullies too.

In fairness I went to private college prep high schools that wouldn't tolerate bullying. Of course the majority of the student body was comprised of the bullied rather than the bulliers.

There were some really prime targets for bullying in high school. I'm talking really geeky fucked up kids and at least one very flamboyant kid but I don't recall any of them ever getting picked on.

If you fucked around in that school, they'd kick you out in a heartbeat. It didn't matter rich your daddy was.
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krabigirl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 11:18 AM
Response to Original message
31. At my high school, the jock types bullied everyone who wasn't like them, period.
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madmom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 11:19 AM
Response to Original message
32. I remember when I was in elementary school (way back in the 60's) there
was a guy who would always hang around us girls. We always chased him away, not because he was gay (we didn't know the meaning) but because back then boys had cooties. We later found out he was indeed gay and even went through with the sex change. When we ran into his older sister after we had grown up, she told us that he did forgive us because we were just children and we have not heard anything about her since. I feel rather sorry that I didn't get to know her after we had grown up. I no longer live in the same state but still hear from some of my school chums from there.:cry:
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bluestateguy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-26-11 11:35 AM
Response to Original message
33. One story that comes to mind (since we are all telling stories)
I remember this school bully back in high school who was not very popular or well liked. Yet he chose to mercilessly pick on this popular pretty cheerleader every day. I remember thinking to myself how stupid he was for doing this.

Well, all the girl had to do was alert her jock/popular male friends (all of whom wanted to get in her pants). They almost got into a fight among themselves over who would get to dispose of the loser bully first!

Needless to say the bully came to school one day all bruised up and never messed with that girl again. He left the school at the end of the semester anyway.
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