My Wife Was Bombarded With Faux News Talking Points Yesterday

[ChoppinBroccoli]

Most people who are familiar with me know that I have a father-in-law who is so cravenly Republican that it makes him almost impossible to speak to most of the time. He never allows the TV channel to leave Faux News when he's at home, and when he does go places, he turns on right-wing hate radio for the trip. He amasses right-wing books, which is interesting, considering the fact that he doesn't ever read them. He just accumulates them. Most of the time, he's OK because he realizes that neither I nor my wife will engage him if he starts in on his right-wing rants, so he just steers clear of the topic. And most of the time he has nothing to say simply because he has managed to keep himself busy doing things out in the yard and/or around the house. But you can always tell when he's been cooped up inside all day watching Faux News, because he becomes a walking, talking repeater of talking points (and he's usually in a foul mood when he does it--he loves Faux News, but for some reason, whenever he watches it, it puts him in a bad mood).

Yesterday, my wife stopped by her parents' house to pick up our kids (they were spending the day with Grandma and Grandpa). From the moment she entered the door, she was getting peppered with talking points. Here are some of the more interesting moments she told me about (and bear in mind, these were all in a SINGLE visit of a little over an hour):

1. He asked her if she watched Obama's "pep rally" and then commented on how inappropriate it was. The words "pep rally" were just dripping with contempt. My wife told him she didn't watch it even though she did. This is the only way to defuse him. If you so much as try to counter his right-wing talking points, he'll snap and start shouting obscenities and usually storm out of the room.

2. He informed my wife that the suburb they live in is not having Kindergarten classes next year because they don't have any money (we have a child who will be entering Kindergarten in the fall, but in a different school district). This was apparently supposed to be some slam on the Democrats and their "mishandling" of the economy, but what he obviously failed to recognize was that their suburb's money problems were the direct result of bitter old people continuously voting down school levies because they don't want to pay a few more dimes in taxes. Not to mention the fact that all the public schools in this State are hurting because 8 solid years of Republican mismanagement have driven the economy right into the ditch. And when the Democratic Governor couldn't completely turn everything around in 4 years, the oh-so-wise voters went out and elected that buffoon Kasich to REALLY screw things up. Anyway, this comment led to the next comment.

3. He informed my wife that States can't declare bankruptcy. My wife is a bankruptcy attorney who works for the State. She knows everything there is to know about this subject. But he heard someone say something on talk radio, and all of a sudden he's an expert (and when my wife told him that only municipalities can declare bankruptcy, he replied, "That's right. Municipalities can," as if he were some kind of authority on the subject). He was worried because he heard something about some municipality declaring bankruptcy and screwing over all its municipal bondholders. He then said that all THEIR bonds were State bonds, and States can't declare bankruptcy. Great, so why are you worried about it?

4. He made the very cryptic statement, "I hope we don't all have to bail out California." When I heard my wife tell me this, I about hit the roof. Apparently he isn't aware that thanks to our wise and benevolent new Governor, we're ALREADY sending millions of dollars meant for Ohio to California simply because A-hole Kasich didn't want it. If he were thinking a little more clearly, he probably should be more worried about California having to bail out Ohio within the next 4 years.

5. He informed my wife that there would be no Social Security money left by the time we were going to be drawing from it. Ignoring the blatantly false talking point, my wife told him, "I wouldn't get Social Security anyway, because State employees get PERS." To which he replied, "Yeah, well they're trying to lump PERS in with Social Security." Whatever.

6. He referred to himself and my mother-in-law as "the working poor." Just a couple of points on that. A) They're not working. Both of them are retired and drawing healthy sums of money every month in retirement. B) They're not even CLOSE to poor. Between the two of them, they make pretty close to $150,000 per year JUST IN RETIREMENT. Then there's the fact that they have roughly half a million dollars tied up in investments (various bonds, CDs, etc.), and the fact that they just got a pretty healthy amount (probably another half-million) from an inheritance a few years ago. They own their home and have no significant bills of any kind. Does THAT sound poor to YOU? My wife and I probably have about one-tenth the financial wherewithal they have, and we don't even consider ourselves poor.

Yes, you can always tell when my father-in-law has been doing nothing but sitting around watching Faux News all day. And then my wife informed me, "Just wait until they start doing their taxes. Then you'll REALLY hear some crap." I'm sure it will be all about how unfairly they're being treated, having to pay taxes and all. And I'm also sure that I'm going to have to hear about how their taxes went up sharply (when I know for a fact that they didn't). It's getting to the point where it's hard to even have a civil conversation with him anymore. He hates me because I brainwashed his daughter and turned her against him, and he obviously has a very low opinion of my wife too, because in order to believe that I brainwashed her, he has to believe that she isn't smart enough to make up her own mind on the issues and just follows along with what I say. It all makes for a lot of tension, and it's the reason why we try to steer well clear of political conversations when he's around. But sometimes he gets a burr in his ass and is just spoilin' for a fight. This was apparently one of those times.

[CBHagman]

1. I'm sorry for your trouble.

And that is not meant to be snarky, either. Relatives, neighbors, and co-workers who speak in almost nothing but right-wing boilerplate are a nuisance faced by a great many of us.

The "working poor" comment goes way beyond the usual, though.

Again, I'm sorry you have to put up with this.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

2. You have my complete sympathies!

I wouldn't suggest that you do anything as vile as wish he would keel over, but...

I hope he is good to your children, and not trying to brainwash them.

Kasich is a walking, talking disaster, and I feel sorry for all my friends in Ohio.

I wish better times for you and your wife and kids...

Recommended.

[ChoppinBroccoli]

5. For All His Faults, He Does Love Our Kids To Death

I'm not particularly worried about him trying to brainwash them. The oldest one is going to be 5 in April, so they're still pretty young. He generally just plays with them, and they all have a great time. His Achilles heel is just that you cannot, under any circumstances, bring up anything political. If you steer clear, things are usually OK. Back when I was naive enough to think I could change his mind (or at least get him to LISTEN), it led to many knock-down drag-outs, but that was years ago. I've learned since then that there's no getting through to him, so it's best just to not even bring it up.

I will say that I'm a bit worried about what might happen when they start to get older and become more politically aware, but by that time, they'll probably not be spending so much time over at the grandparents' house anymore (they'll be in school all day by then--provided public schools still EXIST in Ohio after 4 years of "Let's Privatize Everything" Kasich).

[Mariana]

10. Good that you realized that it's a waste of time

to try to discuss this stuff with him. My experience with my own dad is that you might get him to hear you, and even to agree with you, but he'll forget it all as soon as he turns on Faux or Limpballs again. Then, the next time you discuss it, he'll throw those same talking points back at you - the very ones that he AGREED were wrong before.

[Darth_Kitten]

29. Kids pick up how the adults in their lives act.

No, Grandpa is not setting a very good example.

[MrModerate]

3. I'd recommend you stop picking at this scab. Perhaps your wife . . .

as a "dutiful daughter" feels an obligation to listen to his bilge, but I don't think you're doing yourself any good wallowing in it.

You've figured out your father-in-law pretty clearly: he's a dick. You're not going to change him, ever. You have every insight into the undeserving overentitled mindset you'll ever need. Outside of using it as a springboard for commentary about the wingnutariat, I'd just let it go.

[madmax]

4. I commend both you and your wife for your

patience and fortitude.

[lpbk2713]

6. You can pick your friends but you can't pick your family.

Good luck and hang in there.

[la la]

7. a huge high five to your wife for getting out of that house,

and remaining sane--what about her 'poor' mother---does she have to listen to this drivel/dreck all day long?

(my son in law is a little like your fil--except my sil is pretty much just a blockhead/numbnuts! he repeats the schitt and then goes away mumbling 'fuck' when daughter and i 'correct' him...pretty funny sometimes...)

[Mariana]

9. It's likely that he wan't like this when she was living with him.

My own dad was normal and reasonable until he retired and started listening to Faux and Limpballs every day. He was always rather conservative, but he didn't obsess over it and he sure wasn't so damn gullible. I'm telling you, Faux and RW radio MAKES some of these people crazy - they didn't all start out that way.

[WCGreen]

8. I had very conservative in-laws and would not abide their talking points...

I would not discuss politics when I was in their element and i expected the same when they were in my home...

If a political discussion did happen to break out, I always just stated How's about those Brown, Buckeyes, Caves or Indians, depending on the season.

I came to realize as I got older to pick my battles wisely and not to suffer fools gladly.

From a fellow buckeye who feels your pain and anguish....

[tavalon]

11. Has he become more black and white as he has aged?

Many seem to.

[SharonAnn]

45. And the ones I know who went very right-wing were diagnosed with Alzheimer's

within a couple of years.

I think the black-white thinking is a desire to cimplify because they are losing their cognitive skills.

[tavalon]

50. The body of my post was meant to soften that thought.

but that was my thought, too.

[ChoppinBroccoli]

51. Interesting

Alzheimer's runs in their family. His mother (my wife's grandmother) died of it. And he is showing some signs of it. Mood swings/irrational anger are one indicator.

[gateley]

12. I hope you had a pitcher of martinis awaiting her when she got home. nt

[barbtries]

13. that shit is making people sick

really sick. i fear that by the time your children are just a few years older your relationship with this man will have ended because of his incessant ugliness and bullshit. it really seems pathological, the way they parrot bullshit with total unquestioning belief that will not stand argument. and so full of bile.

[Initech]

15. I'm gonna keep repeating it: Fux News is a virus.

And like all viruses, once it has taken hold, it begins to grow and grow until there's many cells that will not function properly. And unlike some viruses it's got a cure (intellectualism), but no one really wants it.

[hlthe2b]

14. Heavens, you would have to have the "patience of Job"

to survive your FIL. I empathize and sympathize... I don't think I could do it, no matter how much I loved my spouse... Uggh..

[jillan]

16. Does he yell? Because the right wing wacko in my life yells the talking points.

And I just look at him and say Lower your voice. Why are you yelling - did Beck get you all riled up again? And I just walk away. There is nothing you can say or do to reason with these type of people, unfortunately facts don't mean a thing.

Sending a hug to your wife.

[saras]

17. Ignore his politics but not his behavior

If he's behaving inappropriately, point it out. Every time. Never blame it on Faux news - he has to figure that out for himself. But watching TV isn't an excuse for being abusive.

[MedicalAdmin]

25. Bingo.

Yes, you can demand good behavior, especially from the older generation.

When my dad used to go off the deep end I would calmly tell him that I was more than willing to discuss anything he wanted "like an adult" but that if he kept yelling like a child then we were done until he could calm down and control himself. He would always storm off and the return later willing to talk.

Your fil's politics are his politics, but his behavior is not especially where you children, who he seems dotty over, are concerned. Use that and tell him that the behavior won't be allowed in front of your kids. But then listen respectfully and give him the same level of discourse and respect that you are demanding. It might work. But it's worth a shot.

I know it helped with my dad and me.

[DFW]

18. Thank goodness I never had a father-in-law like that, although he hated combative people

He had good reason. He was 17 years old when he was drafted off his farm to join Hitler's Wehrmacht, and was sent to be cannon fodder on the Russian front. As the Germans were retreating from Stalingrad, and he lay half-dead with his leg blown off by a Russian artillery shell, someone notice he was still alive, and he was rescued. He hated anything having to do with the military since then, pleaded with his only son to avoid military service (he did), and hoped all his grandchildren would be girls, so they would never be considered for military service (he got his wish).

Although he stayed Catholic and voted CDU, he never raised the slightest objection to his only daughter marrying a foreigner (me) who was not religious. Our fathers, who were both drafted into World War II, and fought on opposite sides in the war, got to be friends, and any friend of my dad was a friend of mine.

If my father-in-law had been a fanatical rightist, I doubt my relationship with his daughter would have lasted.

[Mimosa]

19. Puzzled at topic.

Why do you sound so aloof from your 'wife'? Most couples have a hard time distinguishing their poits of view since we share points of view. And, straight, bi, gay or trans, the 'in-laws' are outside of the intimacy of the couple.

[B Calm]

20. My co workers are brain washed cons. Everytime you give them facts

they'll get very angry. Unlike you and your husband, sometimes I'll go out of my way just to piss them off.

[Ilsa]

21. I'm so sorry. Perhaps your father-in-law would be happier if he spent

2-3 days a week volunteering? Most schools need mentors, churches need help, food kitchens and pantries need hands-on help. Anything to get him away from the boob tube. He'll probably live longer if he finds new purpose for his life.

[boobooday]

22. Big hugs to your wife

She sounds like a saint.

:hug:

[tabasco]

23. My brother was a dittohead and got cured.

Your FIL seems incurable. Sad.

[Enthusiast]

39. You need to market the cure.

I had no idea one could be cured of such an affliction.

[tabasco]

44. Heavy doses of truth, applied liberally.

Constant smackdowns of taking points.

The procedure only works on patients that still have some interest in discovering the truth. Many do not.

[lonestarnot]

24. To pick up your kids?

Yikes. hugh ugh.

[Vinca]

26. I guess the "up" side for you is that the holidays are over!

[Ezlivin]

27. YouTube! Damn it, get this on YouTube!

A YouTube segment showing your father-in-law foaming at the mouth over some Faux-related talking point would be priceless. It would be the political analogue to "Shit My Father Says."

Video clips showing the mindless raving that passes for discussion nowadays could showcase this Fox-derived political insanity. Imagine what a dozen or more clips like this could do on YouTube.

[Darth_Kitten]

28. Why put up with crap like that?

Why should everyone tiptoe around this angry old bully?

[PassingFair]

34. My mother's father was like that....

My Dad simply refused to have anything to do with him.

My mother was a dutiful daughter to the asshole, and
visited every weekend, usually taking a couple of us
kids with her.

He liked me when I was little, took me fishing at
least once a month.

He was the undisputed king of his castle (apartment)
and everyone was careful not to "set him off".

When I was about 12, I was at their place for the
weekend, and during dinner, the conversation somehow
turned to unions, which I (even at 12) supported strongly.

He was a VP at a bank, and virulently anti-union, and when
I voiced my opinion (an activity that was encouraged strongly
in MY home), he ORDERED ME to shut my mouth, and when I
didn't, he SENT ME AWAY FROM THE TABLE.

...for having an opposing opinion.

Fuck THAT.

It was the last time I visited.

My little sister (11 years younger than me)
was sent to spend a weekend with "Grandmother
and Grandfather" and when my mother picked
her up, she RAN to her, shouting:

"Don't EVER leave me with THESE PEOPLE AGAIN!"

LOL....she was FOUR.

[joshcryer]

41. Inheritance.

The old fogey knows it, too.

[sarcasmo]

30. Same situation here. My wife a few years back told my father in law we do not discuss

religion or politics with family. Her parents don't have much else to talk about other than religion or their right wing talking points so it makes our visits nice and short.

[madokie]

31. You, your wife and the inlaws/outlaws I worry not

It's the children I worry about.
rec

[Jester Messiah]

32. Tell him to knock that shit off, permanently, if he ever wants to see his grandkids again.

You've got a hell of a trump card, if you'd just play it.

[totodeinhere]

38. I think that a remedy such as that is too extreme. No grandparent should be denied access to their

grandchildren bases upon political leanings. That's going way too far.

[Mariana]

46. It wouldn't be based upon his political leanings at all.

It would be based upon his behavior - in this case, antagonizing and harassing the kids' mother in their presence. That should be considered unacceptable.

My parents are racist, and they know that the first time they talk that shit in front of my kid is the last time they'll see her for a good long while. It's not about what they think, they can believe whatever the hell stupidity that they want to. It's about what they DO. They MAY NOT say racist shit around my kid, period.

[Jester Messiah]

52. I disagree.

No kid of mine would get subjected to that evil fascist mind poison. I'd make sure gramps knew that, and that he knew what the consequences of disregarding my wishes would be.

[Jeffersons Ghost]

33. More so than most TV and radio Fox news is pure "brainwashing" of the US public...

Generally, I don't watch TV: But when I was watching some movies at a friends house last night, I noticed the movies focused on the end of the world, another fear inducing tactic.

[Stevenmarc]

35. As long as you're in the will let them yap, and for the hell of it thow in a "You know you're right"

and watch his head snap back in dazed confusion.

[RagAss]

36. My Deepest Sympathy.

[spanone]

37. extreme ignorance

[firehorse]

40. Your father in law sounds like my drunk racist step father

I cut off communication with him 4 years ago. It's great to no longer get the daily mass emails of right wing hate.

[NaturalHigh]

42. Half my in-laws hit me from the right, half from the left.

It's gotten to the point that I just stick with football talk.

[Left coast liberal]

43. Sad. And honestly, I would worry about having my kids spend much time there...

[XanaDUer]

47. I have an uncle who was relatively sane (relatively) until the

explosion in the 80s-90s of RW hate radio and Fox. Now he totally needs to be hospitalized and a forensic shrink examine him. He is also a horrible sociopath (long story).

Anyway, he does the same, except for the book buying. He is of the generation that still has fab union bennies, and still does not get it. Oh, and he lives on the ocean in subsidized housing. He's a real piece of work.

I finally had to cut off contact with him, b/c his derangement was spiraling out of control. Now he's alone (all in-laws and relatives near him avoid him due to his abusive nature and have finally had it with him) and very lonely.

A sad, sad case indeed.

[frogmarch]

48. You are more patient than I am.

I don't think I could stand to be around anyone like your father-in-law. I have a brother-in-law who spews teabagger nonsense and expounds on his hatred of Jews at every chance. After tolerating him for 45 years for the sake of his wife (who's Mr. froggy's sister) Mr. froggy and I finally decided we'd had enough. We no longer have anything to do with him. The last straw came when the jerk cut down our lovely granddaughter for being a vegan. He said vegans are sinners, because God put animals here for people to use. He also went off on the fact that our two adoptive grandchildren are black. Fuck him.

[rbrnmw]

49. I have a family member who spews faux garbage!!!

She has no respect though she will purposely needle me with the lies she heard on faux. She is like the born again Christian who asks if you know Jesus every-time you see them, only she witnesses with her faux news trash and Obama is taking me to hell.

[Obamanaut]

53. Regarding your item 3, perhaps your FIL had heard something about an option

being sought for states to declare bankruptcy, as in:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_topic&forum=439&topic_id=239224

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_topic&forum=439&topic_id=239799

[Zoeisright]

54. Sounds just like my parents.

Both rabid FUX news worshipers, no logical reasoning ability at all, taken in by any conspiracy theory, and repuke to the end.

On edit: Oh my God, were your father-in-law and my father separated at birth?? He thinks my husband brainwashed ME into becoming a liberal, never giving me any credit for thinking ability. And he's poisoning my nieces and nephews, who are also rabid repukes even though they are teenagers. So much so that my niece, who used to cry when I left the house, unfriended me on Facebook because of politics.