Official SOTU drinking game! (48 things to look for)

[Soral]

This year, President Obama's State of the Union address is scheduled for Tuesday, January 25, 2011 at 9pm (Eastern). It should be broadcast on all major networks and cable news/political networks.

Here is a very in depth list of things you can drink to while watching....



General Blather

"The state of our union is strong" (or some version of this): 1 sip

"hope": 1 wishful shot

"change": 1 sip

"hopeful audacity of yes we can change": 1 sip of unicorn wine

"progress": 1 sip

"let me be clear": 1 sip

"make no mistake": 1 sip

"rhetoric or civility": smile falsely while taking a shot

Foreign Policy

"troops": 1 sip

"Iraq": 1 sip

"Afghanistan": 1 sip

"Iran": 1 sip

"Pakistan": 1 sip

"China": shot of something red

"Renmimbi": grab a yuan coin for a game of Chinese quarters

Domestic Policy

"special interests": 1 sip

"education": 1 sip

"reform": 1 sip

"debt": borrow a shot from a friend, promise you'll really pay it back this time

"deficit": finish your drink; borrow the drink of the person next to you and drink it too

"austerity": 1/8 of a shot

"stimulus": 1 espresso or coffee liqueur shot

"investment" in reference to government spending: 1 sip

"investment"in reference to individual discretionary financial decisions: hide your shot under your bed; drink it the next time the Dow drops 100 points

"unemployment": 1 sip

"jobs ": 1 sip
+1 if you've been unemployed in the last year
+2 if you're unemployed today (we've been there)

"Wall Street": 1 hoity toity shot

"Main Street": PBR gulp

"budget freeze": mix a frozen drink, pour the frozen drink into a cup half the size of the drink and lick the remnants off the floor (It's a budget metaphor. Get it? Har!)

"filibuster": drink until 60% of the people with whom you're watching agree to stop... or go unconscious

"Don't mess with Texas!" (Sure it's a non-sequitur, but why break tradition?): Exchange confused glances, drink freely



Every time he....

references streamlining or reducing unnecessary regulation: streamline the contents of your glass into your mouth

uses an anecdote to defend a policy: 1 for health care reform, 2 for anything else

refers to the unusual seating arrangement: change seats with someone

sets a long-term objective or vision to be met after his current term is up: shot of what you'd like to be drinking in 2021 and beyond

Every time the camera shows....

the First Lady: 1 sip

the First Lady's arms: 1 sip, delivered by bicep curl

Joe Biden, and he looks like he wants to interrupt the speech: 1 sip

your congressman/woman: 1 sip, and pat yourself on the back for being able to identify your congressman/woman

a close-up on Speaker John Boehner: 1 sip, +2 if he's crying...best if drinking the most bronzed or orange beverage available

a "special guest" who is introduced by the President: 1 sip

a "special guest" who is a member of the armed forces: 1 sip

a standing ovation from HALF of Congress (Keep in mind the new civility-inspired mixed seating arrangement): 2 sips

Other

if the speech is under an hour: Finish your drink and have another beer



REPUBLICAN RESPONSE BONUS GAME

If Rep. Paul Ryan says:

"socialism/ist"; "communism/ist": 1 shot of something red, drunk with your left hand

reference to people rejecting Obama's policies at the ballot box: 1 sip

"wasteful spending": 1 sip

"Tea Party": one shot, drunk from a tea cup (or tea pot if you really want to get into it)


http://www.drinkinggame.us/

[laconicsax]

1. What's this "sip" crap?

Harden the fuck up! :P

[Sonoman]

5. Yep. More like "Slam".

We'll be at Meritage, on the corner of 1st and Napa Streets.

Sonoman

[Soral]

8. Sorry, not a drinker :(

[Sonoman]

9. That's OK

We are really entertaining and maybe you could drive us home.

Sonoman

[meegbear]

2. 48? Fuck that!

http://crooksandliars.com/susie-madrak/watching-state-union-tonight-0

[orleans]

10. that's great. thanks for putting it up. n/t

[Kalyke]

3. LMAO!!

Very clever!

[Initech]

4. Just chug the whole bottle of Cuervo Bluto-from Animal House style.

By the time you come to, you'll already be ready for next years.

[cbdo2007]

6. If he says we've been in contact with UFOs and aliens - I'm drinking a whole bottle of whiskey.

[SammyWinstonJack]

7. LOL.

:spray:

[orleans]

11. very fun. you had me at "unicorn wine" n/t

[many a good man]

12. If we hear the word "freeze"....

Down the whole bottle!