You are viewing an obsolete version of the DU website which is no longer supported by the Administrators. Visit The New DU.
Democratic Underground Latest Greatest Lobby Journals Search Options Help Login

A little George Carlin humor for this Saturday [View All]

Printer-friendly format Printer-friendly format
Printer-friendly format Email this thread to a friend
Printer-friendly format Bookmark this thread
This topic is archived.
Home » Discuss » The DU Lounge Donate to DU
littlejoe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-21-04 02:02 PM
Original message
A little George Carlin humor for this Saturday
Advertisements [?]

You know what would be great? To be in a coma. You're still alive, but you have no responsibilities.

"He owes me six thousand dollars."
"He's in a coma."
"Never mind."

You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar.

When someone asks you what time it is, glance at your watch and say, "It's either six-fifteen, or Mickey has a hard-on."
Guaranteed they will ask someone else.

Sometimes, when you're burying a guy alive, for a moment or two you start feeling sorry for him. And then it passes and you keep on shovelling.

Wouldn't it be great if Dan Rather snuck up on Tom Brokaw during the news and stabbed him in the head?

Live and let live, that's what I say. Anyone who can't understand that should be killed. It's a simple philosophy, but it's worked well in our family.

Jesus doesn't really love you, but he thinks you have a great personality.

When you read about all the presidents who had affairs, you feel sorry for Gerald Ford. Apparently nobody wanted to fuck him. Except Betty. And she was drunk a lot.

Have a good day, people!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top

Home » Discuss » The DU Lounge Donate to DU

Powered by DCForum+ Version 1.1 Copyright 1997-2002
Software has been extensively modified by the DU administrators

Important Notices: By participating on this discussion board, visitors agree to abide by the rules outlined on our Rules page. Messages posted on the Democratic Underground Discussion Forums are the opinions of the individuals who post them, and do not necessarily represent the opinions of Democratic Underground, LLC.

Home  |  Discussion Forums  |  Journals |  Store  |  Donate

About DU  |  Contact Us  |  Privacy Policy

Got a message for Democratic Underground? Click here to send us a message.

© 2001 - 2011 Democratic Underground, LLC