Every political movement needs a song. Even underprivileged corporations, long the victims of brutal and dehumanizing discrimination, need a song. Did you ever consider THEIR feelings? Did you ever consider their cries? Or dry their tears? Did you ever consider what THEY were going through? It's not EASY being a corporation! Corporations pay taxes don't they? No taxation without representation! People vote, have families and things like that. Why not corporations? Now that the Supreme Court, in its loving fascist understanding, has finally recognized the full personhood of corporations, it is only FAIR that corporations, these tender, disadvantaged little ones, have their own song. It's time to stop getting emotional and hysterical against the full rightful personhood of corporations and finally acquiesce to their EQUAL RIGHTS!
I originally wrote the lyrics to this song on a challenge from another DUer and I've now revised and refined the lyrics.
The music is from "Free To Be You And Me," a film from 1974 with Harry Belafonte and Marlo Thomas. The original song, in the film, is "Parents Are People." The original is no longer on YouTube but you can hear a similar version here (a bit of a spoof of the original and even the music is slightly off from the original in addition to the lyrics):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T5uB4F_aktgHow I changed the lyrics:
Just change the lyrics like this:
(I've reworded the lyrics without use of the simultaneous different lyrics for the two singing parts in the original, which complicates, this is for a single singing role here.)
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE
Corporations are people, people with children
When corporations were little, they used to be boys
Like some of you, but then they grew
And now corporations are women,
Women with children
Fathers with children
Busy with children, and things that they do
There are a lot of things a lot of companies do
Some comp'nies are doctors, some companies bakers,
Plumbers, house painters
Or funny joke makers
Corporations do haircuts and brain surgery
Yeah, corporations can be almost anything they want to be
Corporations are people, people with children
When corporations were little, they used to be kids
Like all of you, but then they grew
And now comp'nies are grownups,
Grownups with children
Busy with children, and things that they do
There are a lot of things a lot of firms and a lot of comp'nies and a lot corporations can do.
Welp, that pretty much settles it. Corporations are people! The song SAYS so! And this we did not even know. . .
And so said the Supreme Court, full of great people who were selected by politicians who didn't win no STINKIN' elections!!!!!!!!!!!!
So whenever the issue comes up, just walk into your local Congressman's office or wherever and just start singin'! You TELL 'em! Corporations are people!
The next time one o' them lousy, stinkin,' socialist, smash-mouth, fuster-brain Dermacrit Obamer-luvin libruls tries ta take away yer gun rights and the SACRED rights of corporations everywhere AS ONLY A FERNER COMMIE CAN DO, you just show up at the political event and start singin' a cupla bars o' this here song ta set the dang blasted record straight man an' boy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
CORPORATIONS ARE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
Nuf said.
So all youz lousy stinkin' so-called people who ain't got no incorporation papers ta prove yer citizenship, shut up, ship out and beat it!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Traitors.