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"‘GIGLI’ Really Wows RAZZIE® Voters" (6 "Awards"!)

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AmericanErrorist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-29-04 04:59 PM
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"‘GIGLI’ Really Wows RAZZIE® Voters" (6 "Awards"!)
Although it fell one statuette short of the record 7 “wins” racked up by all-time champions SHOWGIRLS and BATTLEFIELD EARTH, the Bennifer Box Office Blowfest GIGLI set an impressive new record of its own at Saturday’s 24th Annual RAZZIE® Awards, dis-honoring 2003’s WORST Achievements in Film. It’s six award sweep of Tinsel Town’s Tackiest Trophy Derby make GIGLI the equivalent of IT HAPPENED ONE NIGHT – The first film ever to take ALL SIX “top” RAZZIES®: Worst Picture, Worst Actor (Ben Affleck), Worst Actress (Jennifer Lopez) and Worst Screen Couple (Affleck & Lopez combined) as well as Worst Screenplay and Worst Director (both the work of Triple-Crown “winner” Martin Brest, who also co-produced the film). As usual, no “winners” were expected to be in attendance when envelopes were opened and results revealed in The Penthouse Suite of the 4-Points/Sheraton Hotel in Santa Monica, California.

Stopping GIGLI from collecting every award given were two RAZZIE® stalwarts. All-Time RAZZIE® Cham-Peen Sylvester Stallone beat out GIGLI Supporting Actor nominees Al Pacino and Christopher Walken to set a new record of his own: a staggering 30 nominations and 10 “wins.” Another long-term RAZZIE® target took the OTHER Worst Supporting award from GIGLI nominee Lainie Kazan: Two-time Worst Actress “winner” Demi Moore not only “won” Worst Supporting Actress, but her “comeback vehicle” CHARLIE’S ANGELS: FULL THROTTLE was also picked as Worst Remake or Sequel. Landing with a resounding ker-splat in the litter box next to these box office duds was the RAZZIE® voters’ choice in a new category, Worst Excuse for an Actual Movie, the over-hyped, hopelessly tasteless Mike Myers version of THE CAT-IN-THE-HAT, which entered the competition with an impressive 8 nominations. Also presented in the one-hour ceremony satirizing Hollywood award shows in general (and the Oscars® in particular) was a Special Governor’s Award for Distinguished Under-Achievement, given to Travis Payne, whose choreography for Worst Picture nominee FROM JUSTIN TO KELLY was deemed too amusingly awful to go un-dissed.

“Winners” were determined by mailing ballots to 617 Golden Raspberry Award Foundation members throughout 39 U.S. states and 15 foreign countries. The award itself is a handcrafted gold spray-painted golf-ball-sized raspberry atop a mangled reel of Super 8 film, with an estimated street value of $4.89. The RAZZIES® were created in 1980 by John Wilson, a life-long cynic and Cine-Maniac as well as the author of both EVERYTHING I KNOW I LEARNED AT THE MOVIES and the up-coming Warner book THE OFFICIAL RAZZIE® MOVIE GUIDE, scheduled for release to tie-in with next year’s 25th Annual RAZZIE® Awards.

The full list of "winners" are at:
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burythehatchet Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-29-04 05:02 PM
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1. Now I've GOTTA rent it!!
Edited on Sun Feb-29-04 05:03 PM by burythehatchet
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KissMyAsscroft Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-29-04 05:04 PM
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2. Man, that movie seriously is the worst...

I thought that being were being too hard on it, so I downloaded a about a third of the movie. I could only stomach about ten minutes of it. LAME.

It really is amazingly bad. Jaw droppingly bad. You have to see it to believe it.
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DuctapeFatwa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-29-04 05:05 PM
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3. Unlettered goofuses who are not sophisticated enough to understand Gigli

are to be pitied. Gigli is hilarious!

I bet most of these pathetic moviephile wannabes actually paid to see Lord of the Rings.
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Devil Dog Dem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-29-04 05:31 PM
Response to Original message
4. What is the flag in your post?
A CW Regimental Flag?
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