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Obama had NOTHING to do with capturing bin Laden. George Dubya Bush did it single-handedly.

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HopeHoops Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri May-06-11 08:34 AM
Original message
Obama had NOTHING to do with capturing bin Laden. George Dubya Bush did it single-handedly.
It all started when Dubya picked up a signal on his Dick Tracy Secret Decoder Spy Watch that he sent away for after collecting enough Bazooka Joe bubble gum wrappers. He knew where bin Laden was at last.

He ran out to the Monster Truck Limo and took the red, white, and blue Truck Nutz off of the back and put them on his private fighter jet. Then he told his wife to fuel up the jet while he ran back in to put on his flight suit costume and grab a couple of fifths of JD.

Condi was finished with the fueling operation when he returned. He climbed in the cockpit, popped "The Best of Wayne Newton" into the 8-track player, and took off from the ranch.

Checking The Google on the Internets, he located bin Laden's hideout and set a course for it, diverting an aircraft carrier along the way by contacting it on the CB radio.

He landed on the roof of the compound, got out, and smashed an empty JD bottle on the cockpit windshield. Then he stormed the compound armed with nothing but a Colt45 revolver in each hand, taking out 12 heavily armed guards with one bullet each. They were sporting AK-47s, RPG launchers, and bazookas, but he had the advantage of that "macho thing" and his lucky Captain America undies.

Out of ammunition, he had no option left but to engage bin Laden in hand-to-hand combat resulting in the death of the evildoer. He dragged bin Laden's body to the fighter jet and tied it to the hood right behind the steer horns. Then he took off from the roof and met up with the aircraft carrier he had ordered to change course on the way over.

He hopped out of the jet, smashed another empty JD bottle on the cockpit windshield and tossed a "Mission Accomplished" banner at the captain, telling him to have it up in plain view in ten minutes for the photo-op. FOX News already had a crew set up to record the historic event.

So you see? Obama had absolutely nothing to do with the operation and neither did the Navy SEALs. That's just campaign rhetoric from the left.



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panader0 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri May-06-11 08:44 AM
Response to Original message
1. Poor Wayne Newton............
funny stuff.
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deacon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri May-06-11 08:58 AM
Response to Original message
2. Bush should replace chuck norris in the chuck norris jokes. n/t
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HopeHoops Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri May-06-11 09:01 AM
Response to Reply #2
3. Nah - Chuck Norris knows how to FIGHT!
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blm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri May-06-11 09:08 AM
Response to Reply #3
6. Norris knows HOW to fight just like Ted Nugent knows HOW to shoot a gun. Would they risk their lives
Edited on Fri May-06-11 09:08 AM by blm
in any meaningful way for their country and their right to open and accountable government......NO!
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Starboard Tack Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri May-06-11 09:02 AM
Response to Original message
4. Hayul, I jes new he wuz a heerow
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pipi_k Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri May-06-11 09:06 AM
Response to Original message
5. There seems to be something missing in that account...
Bush was certainly not out of ammunition...

He still had his secret magic pretzel stick stashed in his codpiece.

Diverting OBL's attention with some shadow animals on the wall, Bush quickly pulled out his pretzel stick and shoved it into OBL's eye, killing him instantly.

Viva la UTZ!!!

:fistbump:





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HopeHoops Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri May-06-11 09:14 AM
Response to Reply #5
7. I couldn't include that without mentioning the fact that he was really choking on the pretzels.
That just didn't fit the "hero" image.

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AllyCat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri May-06-11 09:24 AM
Response to Original message
8. Thanks for the laugh this morning!
Good one :evilgrin:
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HopeHoops Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri May-06-11 11:14 AM
Response to Reply #8
9. I came up with that about 3 a.m. - wasn't sleeping anyway.
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